Spurious Awards Of The Week

Chocolate Star Wars , much Doctor Who -ness, anime Futurama , Grimm , vampire wars and headbutts

GENRE-CROSSING OF THE WEEK

Aliens on ice. We’d prefer this on a Sunday night to Dancing On Ice . Hell, we’d prefer Immortals On Ice to Dancing On Ice . But if the aliens could eat Phillip Schoffield, then we’d settle for Dancing On Ice . This has been created by The Old Murder House Theater troupe from Austin, Texas and perhaps the most disturbing thing about it is a grown man with a beard playing Newt.

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MAKEOVER THE WEEK

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Futurama goes anime in the season six finale.

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MONSTER OF THE WEEK

We thought the CGI monsters on Grimm were a bit crap this week, until we realised it just a bit of animated promotion for another show.

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GIT WHO ACHIEVES REDEMPTION OF THE WEEK

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Three clips of a subplot from “Chuck Versus The Business Trip” showing Casey at his worst and best (or best and worst, depending on what you want out of your Casey-age), as Morgan tries to remember what it’s like to be a geek. Spoilers, obviously… But – great episode.

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HEADBUTT OF THE WEEK

Hitler came off badly when he encountered the Doctor, but getting locked in a cupboard was nothing compared to what Kelly had in store for him.

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PUBLIC INFORMATION FILM OF THE WEEK

William Shatner’s guide to unfriending.

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IDENTITY CRISIS OF THE WEEK

Peter Jackson reveals to The Otago Daily Times (a local paper from near to where he’s shooting at the moment) about the moment he had to pretend to be someone else: “We had the weekend off and walking around Queenstown, just going shopping, I’m banging into crew the whole time, so you sort of get the feeling we’ve taken over Queenstown.

“The funniest thing that happened down here was I was walking around the [Queenstown] mall and a lot of people were asking for photos and stuff, which was fine, and then this young backpacker type guy comes up to me says, ‘Ah, are you Peter Jackson? Oh my god, you’re Peter Jackson, aren't you?’

“I say, ‘Yeah,’ and he says, ‘Ah, I’ve only got one question I want to ask you.’ I said, ‘Sure, fire away.’ He says, ‘When’s Avatar 2 coming out’' And I said, ‘In about three years.’ He said, ‘Oh cool, mate, thanks!’ and he walked away a happy man. That was good. Always pleased to help anybody I can.”

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SHIRT OF THE WEEK

One of those “We’re surprised no one’s thought of it before!” ideas. After all – 11 doctors; it’s obvious. Although we’re not entirely sure that’s supposed to be between McCoy and Eccleston (it looks like Rowan Atkinson from “The Curse Of Fatal Death” to us) it's still brilliantly realised, though, and available from redbubble .

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MOVEMBER PARTICIPANT OF THE MONTH

The Doctor grows a ’tache. Another T-shirt design, courtesy of Teefury , but it’s a limited edition, so it’ll probably be gone by the time you read this.

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BURNT FANGS OF THE WEEK

Interview With A Vampire author Anne Rice suffered the wrath of Stephenie Meyer this week, because she committed the cardinal sin of crediting her with a sense of irony. She cause a furore on Facebook after commenting that the undead in her books would “feel sorry for vampires that sparkle in the sun”. “I was just joking,” she attempted to backtrack on The Daily Beast . “People ask me what I think about that, and I finally pretended that Lestat and Louis were real and gave their opinion on what they thought of the vampires in Twilight . Unfortunately, I think some of Stephenie Meyer readers took it the wrong way, came to my Facebook page, and were quite unpleasant.” She added tactfully, “But I think they’re very... young.”

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MOST UNSURPRISING ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE WEEK

This one contains spoilers for Fantastic Four #600. But even by saying that, we’ve probably given away a spolier, because there’s only bleedin’ thing it can be. The Human Torch is coming back from the dead. Here’s your feather. Strike us down.

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COOLEST COAT OF THE WEEK

Who would not want a Star Wars X-Wing pilot hoodie with a zip-front and a hood that doubles as an X-Wing Pilot helmet, complete with visor? Not recommended for pulling down over your eyes when you’re driving, no matter how strong in the Force you feel. Available for $150 from ShopEcko .

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MINIMALIST POSTERS OF THE WEEK

The Modern Stylographer has created a stunning set of 57 minimalist posters based on each episode of New Who . Here are just a few. We urge you to check out the complete collection, but be warned: you may want to buy them all. Apart from “The Curse Of The Black Spot” maybe…

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RUSSIAN DOLLS OF THE WEEK

We think this could be the result of one of R2-D2’s fever dreams. We never realised he had short droid syndrome. Via Superpunch

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SEAT OF THE WEEK

And while we’re on the subject of R2-D2’s fantasies… Available via ThinkGeek .

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POSSIBLE FUTURE OF THE WEEK

Ever wondered what would happen if the zombies ever caught up with the human survivors in The Walking Dead ? Buzzfeed may have the answer.

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MIX-UP OF THE WEEK

Misfits was robbed. And if there's one bunch of maladjusted, superpowered hardnuts you don’t want to rob it’s this bunch. So who should be quaking in his boots? The Doctor, that’s who. We would explain the story ourselves, but the Channel 4 press team did such a brilliant job with their press release, we thought we’d reprint it here in full:

“In their time, those orange-jumpsuited miscreants the Misfits have faced some terrible enemies, including psycho probation worker, video game man, tattoo weirdo and milkboy. But today it emerged they had been attacked by their most deadly foe of all – RTS Not Very Good at Adding Up Man (or possibly woman, no sexism here please!)

“Due to an administrative error, at Monday evening’s RTS Craft and Design Awards, the award for Best Effects – Digital was given to Doctor Who when, in fact, the jury had voted for Misfits , for the digital effects supplied by the company Shadowjack.

“The mistake was discovered thanks to Kelly, whose ability to read minds ensured that she knew in advance how all of the jury had voted.

“The RTS has taken immediate and thorough steps to rectify the situation, and the award will now go to Shadowjack, Clerkenwell Films and E4. Erik Ellefsen, George Kyparissous, Sarah Norton and Jo Amery of Shadowjack will be presented with their award at a special ceremony in the New Year.

“In order to spare any blushes, the RTS has requested that Curtis use his powers to turn back time so that the whole mistake could be avoided. Unfortunately, it has been pointed out that Curtis no longer has that power in the latest series, and his ability to turn himself into a woman is of little advantage in this situation.

“It was subsequently pointed out that Kelly’s mind-reading powers were also from a previous series. However, we are the Channel 4 Press Centre, and our secret power is to be able to write articles with no consistency or continuity whatsoever. Ha. Shazam. Take that!

“We are now looking into the possibility that every single award given at Monday’s ceremony, and indeed at every awards ceremony in recent years, should have gone to the Channel 4 stable. After all, any other result just seems ridiculous.”

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EXREMELY POOR TASTE FEATURE OF THE WEEK

In a week when a crew member was killed in a accident on the set of GI Joe 2 , The Hollywood Reporter decided to mark the tragedy not with an obituary but a multi page feature entitled, “Lights, Camera, Accident! 20 Hollywood Stunts Gone Wrong!” Have they been taken over by the editorial team of The Day Today ?

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MOTORBIKE ACCESSORY OF THE WEEK

Now you can be a Tron Guy without looking a total tit.

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CONFECTIONARY OF THE WEEK

A long time ago (but still within its Best By date) in a Galaxy bar far, far away. Bite into it in the right place and discover the nuts…

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RETROVISION OF THE WEEK

By Snake Artist, Via Deviant Art .

Dave Golder
Freelance Writer

Dave is a TV and film journalist who specializes in the science fiction and fantasy genres. He's written books about film posters and post-apocalypses, alongside writing for SFX Magazine for many years.