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BLOG Geeky Conversations With My Six Year Old Daughter by Stacey Whittle, Aged 35

Features
By Stacy Whittle published 14 May 2013

Why Miss Marple is a Time Lord and other great revelations, by Stacey Whittle

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Doctor Who

Tala: “How come all the Miss Marbles we watch have different Miss Marbles?”
Me: “Well, Miss Marple is a Time Lord and so she regenerates. She is almost exactly like Doctor Who because they both like solving puzzles and knitting. Also she has two hearts.”

Tala: “Cybermen say ‘Dalete’.”
Me: “No darling, they say, ‘Delete’.”
Tala: “Well, I think ‘delete’ sounds stupid. I’m going to say, ‘Dalete! Dalete! Dalete!’”
Me: “IT’S ‘DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!’”
Tala: *glares* “Dalete!”
Me, under my breath: “Delete.”

Tala: “You love the second doctor don’t you mammy?”
Me: “I do darling.”
Tala: “Would you get married to him?”
Me: “Absolutely, in a heartbeat.”
Tala: “Well you can’t can you because he’s dead. ‘DALEEEETTTTTE!’”
Me: ‘It’s ‘Delete’,”

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Tala: “How do you know so much about this stuff anyway?”
Me: “Because I have you and therefore no life baby.”
Tala: “Is it because you are secretly, really a Time Lord?”
Me: “Yes.”

Tala: “Is that the new Doctor Who Magazine ?”
Me: “Yes, look there’s a picture with all the Doctors.”
Tala: “Ah that’s rubbish, they haven’t even got them in the right order… the Fourth Doctor is standing next to the Seventh Doctor – what were they thinking? That’s stupid!”
Me: “Oh God, what have I done to you?”

Tala: “Ooh, is that the new Doctor Who Magazine ? Look at them guys on the front. I know them big bottomed guys – they’re from Mars, the second doctor fought them!”
Me: “Oh God, what have I done to you?”

He-Man and She-Ra

Tala: “Why can’t the Sorceress use magic outside Castle Grayskull? That’s stupid!”

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Tala: “Why doesn’t she just tell Teela she’s her mother? That’s stupid!”

Tala: “Why isn’t She-Ra all muscly like He-Man? She should have legs like the Hulk and say She-Ra Smash! That’s stupid!”

Me: “If you think it’s stupid why don’t you watch something else?”
Tala: “It’s my favourite!”
Me: “There’s a name for trolls like you!”

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Defenders Of The Earth

Tala: “None of the kids at school know how to play this with me, they don’t even know who The Phantom is, how crazy is that?”
Me: “Oh God, what have I done to you?”

Batman The Brave And The Bold

Tala: “I love Ockwa man the best, he is EPIC!”
Me: “It’s Aquaman darling.”
Tala: “No, it’s OCKWA MAN.”
Me: “No love it’s Aquaman. It’s just they’re American and it sounds a little bit different.”
Tala: “It’s OCKWA MAN!”
Me: “AQUA!”
Tala: “OCKWAMAN vs The Cybermen: ‘Daaaaaaaaaaalete!’”
Me: “Where’s the gin?”

Star Trek The Next Generation

Tala: “Oh m God, Professor X can WALK!”

Tala: “When’s that robot going to start shooting lasers out of his eyes?”
Me: “He’s not a robot he’s an android.”
Tala: “When’s that android going to start shooting lasers out of his eyes?”

Tala: “When’s Darth Vader showing up anyway he’s much cooler than that robot!”

Stacy Whittle
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