Fighters Uncaged review

If you thought you looked dumb while you played boxing on the Wii then wait until you play Fighters Uncaged for the Xbox 360 Kinect. The Technology behind Kinect is amazing and works a lot better then most of us presumed after seeing the first few live demos. Somehow the designers behind Fighters Uncaged missed the press kit.

In Fighters Uncaged you play as a hybrid baby of Vin Diesel and Paul Walker minus any talent either of them may have. Unfortunately for anyone that has an IQ greater than a baked potato, there is no story or plot what-so-ever in this game.

There are three levels to your fighting in Fighters Uncaged: Short Range, Medium Range and Long Range. The difference in distance only determines which attacks you can actually connect with while fighting. When your special meter fills up to the point of use, you do not have to do the back flips yourself (which could have added some form of entertainment).

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Although Fighters Uncaged is a launch title for Microsoft’s Kinect, it is in no way a display or accurate depiction of how the technology works. Ubisoft and AMA Studios didn’t drop the ball on this title; they weren’t even invited to the sport in which the ball exists. Every third punch thrown is recognized and every block you attempt is either exaggerated or completely ignored. The voice acting and cutscenes are worse than anything in this generation of gaming. To top off the cake of horrifying taste is the maraschino cherry known only as the ridiculously stupid and repetitive inner monologue advice. There has never been a more annoying voice in videogames; Navi in Ocarina of Time was at least funny after a while.

The AI in Fighters Uncaged is equally as unintelligent. There is never a rhyme or reason to the attacks they use and no common rhythm. The difference between the scrawny Asian opponent and the large biker is miniscule and it feels like you’re still swinging relentlessly at the same dummy. In a clouded experience ripe with fatal blows, at least landing a solid head kick is fairly satisfying.

There is nothing inside Fighters Uncaged that makes it worthy of your money or your time. The only other plus to playing this title is the extreme exercise you receive due to over-compensating for the game’s inaccuracy.

Nov 23, 2010