You've probably heard the saying that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. I feel like that's kind of off-base, because in Grand Theft Auto, I can do a ton of different things and get a ton of different results and it's still certifiably batshit insane. I can crash a 747, or buy from a butcher selling human organs, or find tears in the fabric of game reality.
While this leads to persistent yet totally false rumors because they're just so dang believable, just as often you realize this crazy stuff is 100% accurate. Here I have nine such rumors people believed about GTA games (that were completely true), which could not sound crazier if they tried. And yet, the evidence is right there and absolutely confirmed. Madness, MADNESS!
The Liberty City statue has a giant beating heart inside it in GTA 4
The Statue of Happiness that stands in Liberty City is pretty unnerving, with her creepy smile and tablet filled with an on-point but uncomfortably critical takedown of American exceptionalism. You wouldn't think she could get any creepier, until you heard rumors that there's something to be found inside her copper rib cage. It really, really should be more concrete, but some fans claimed that there's a big 'ol beating heart in there straight out of the deepest pits of Hellraiser fantasy. That would be completely terrifying if it were true but oh. Oh it is. Dear God.
Apparently with a little well-timed tuck-and-rolling, you can bail out of a helicopter and onto the top of the Statue of Happiness' base. There you'll find a door marked "No Hidden Content This Way" (hurr hurr), and the path beyond leads to the very literal heart of Liberty City: a giant, pulsing, chained up human heart that seems to be humming for some reason. Shinji Mikami, eat your err, something out. An internal organ of some sort.
You can track the movements of a serial killer and find his victims in GTA 5
Walk into the right abandoned building in GTA 5, and you might find the words "THERE WILL BE 8" enthusiastically scrawled across the wall. While graffiti is low on the list of interesting crimes committed in these parts, fans soon began to insist that this bit of graffiti was important because it detailed the movements of an in-game serial killer. That might sound far fetched until you realize they followed those clues all the way to the bodies.
Rumors started flying as players discovered a newspaper that dubbed serial killer Merle Abrahams the "Infinity Killer", noting that he had murdered eight people. Then there's a poem scrawled on a rock in the desert with the number eight scribbled all around it, and hints you should totally check out the penitentiary. Following all these clues correctly proves the rumors right, leading you to bodies at the bottom of the ocean in the most gruesome scuba trip meets Easter Egg hunt imaginable.
It rains pedestrians at Caligula's Palace casino in GTA San Andreas
What happens at Caligula's Palace casino stays at Caligula's Palace casino, as long as they can hide all those bodies that supposedly fall out of the sky onto the roof. No really officer, I swear! While this may seem like yet another ludicrous rumor (it'll start raining bigfoots any day now), a trip to this den of sin shows maybe human beings falling out of the sky onto the casino's roof isn't as crazy as you think. Wait no, it's still crazy. Possible. There we go.
To see this human precipitation for yourself, as with most things in GTA, you start by shooting the heck out of everyone. Take out a bunch of the NPCs in the casino, then head to the roof. There, the NPCs you wiped out down below will reappear an unfortunate distance above the casino, splattering against the roof tiles on the way down. This is a result of a glitch that shifts the NPC spawn point with lethal results. But unlike the debunked 'suicidal pedestrians' rumor, this one doesn't assume intent. Those peds were just born and reborn into a cruel and glitchy world.
There's a mass grave in GTA San Andreas
If I didn't know better, I'd say that murder was a common occurrence in GTA. Thank the serial killers taking people out, gangsters staking their claims, and you, oh you, acting with all the conscience and wanton destruction of a nuclear bomb. With as many casualties as a regular Tuesday sees in San Andreas, it's not surprising that people start seeing it everywhere, even imagining some rocks in a desert are actually body bags in a mass grave. How silly! How - wait. Those are coded in as body bags? Oh
While it's been clarified that yes, the rumored location does exist and yes those really are body bags, little else is definitive. There's only theories left to fill in the gaps, like the idea that the killer was definitely husband-murdering radio host Mary-Beth Maybell. Or it was the Sindacco crime family. Or maybe it was that weird NPC in a trenchcoat. And that, my friends, is how rumors get started.
There's a crazy Illuminati-style diagram on Mount Chiliad in GTA 5...
I think 'pretty damn crazy' is the nicest way to describe the race to find what was at the top of Mt. Chilliad after the release of GTA 5. After the title's gameplay demo showed an isolated shed sitting atop Chilliad in highly conspicuous fashion, fans were instantly enamored with it (rather than the insane police shootouts or amazingly detailed world, but you know, whatever). Fan frenzy reached a fever pitch as the release date approached, and launch day saw an intense scramble to the mountaintop to see what lay within the mystery shed. Probably a jetpack! Always with the jetpacks. Turns out no such 'pack existed, crushing the hopes and dreams of mighty adventurers everywhere. But there was this weird drawing!
The center of what is now called the 'Mt. Chilliad mystery', the cryptic-looking scrawl on the inside of the shed appears to be a map with some serious Illuminati overtones. A giant eye sits atop a scribble of what is probably Mt. Chilliad itself, with some red X's, a UFO, an egg, and a human figure (wearing A JETPACKDSLJFDKS) filling up the center. All the energy that was put into exploring the shed slingshotted right into uncovering the mystery of the mountain, and it may have already turned something up. Now, after 3 years, the whole mystery is bigger than ever as some think it's about to be solved.
...and it points to a ton of UFOs
As mentioned, one of the first things you see in Chilliad's tinhatter eye candy is a drawing of a UFO. Since flying saucers go with the All-Seeing Eye like fish and CIA brain chips, it's no surprise to see one in this drawing, and dismiss rumors that such a craft actually exists within the GTA world. I mean, this is clearly the scrawl of a madman! It's just that the madmen in question are the folks at Rockstar, and those UFOs totally do exist. Looks like the inmates are running the asylum.
There's a total of four UFOs in San Andreas, most of which hover menacingly in the sky overhead like UFOs tend to do. After you've reached 100% completion, the first can be found above the high-security government base Fort Zancudo, another over the town of Sandy Shores, a third at the apex of Mt. Chilliad, and a fourth lodged in the ocean bed off Paleto Bay. While all of them can be approached, the three functional saucers will emit a horrible screeching sound as you draw near, and cut the engine on any helicopter or plane you might be flying. Rude little jerks.
There's a ghost on Mt. Gordo in GTA 5
Whoa whoa, UFOs and clichd Illuminati symbolism? That's just too crazy. Let's go with something easier to handle. Like ghosts. Yeah, ghosts are good, especially because in the GTA universe, rumors of their appearance are nearly always debunked. That puts them on level with Leatherface and the Loch Ness Monster, so it's generally safe to assume that any GTA ghost you hear of is less ectoplasm and more hot air. Well, except for that one lady.
If you head up Mt. Gordo in Los Santos (what is it with mountains around here?) you'll discover a rock with the word JOCK written on it in a red substance that's probably not spray paint, let's be honest. That's already weird enough, but if you decide to hang out until 11:00pm a terrifying ghost woman will appear nearby, bobbing around and disappearing if you get too close. No more information can be found at the haunting grounds themselves. However, reading a newspaper archived at the in-game website whokilledleonorajohnson.com reveals that the 'accidental' death of a woman named Jolene Cranley-Evans occurred there in the late 70's while she was on a hike with her husband. Her husband's name? John "Jock" Cranley. Ho boy.
There's a hatch at the bottom of the ocean in GTA 5, and it has a message for you
So we have aliens. We have ghosts. We have a world where it literally rains men. But surely we draw the line at LOST references mysterious doors in the ocean floor leading to an alternate reality? That's where we get to 'dinosaurs in the desert' levels of rumor-mongering, right??! Turns out no - such a hatch does exist, and if you get close enough to listen you will hear the most horrifying sound you could possibly imagine.
The rumored existence of the hatch was proven quickly enough, through replicated screenshots by a bunch of different players. The sound was trickier though, because no one was able to get close enough to make it out before being crushed by oceanic pressure. However, using invincibility mode eventually allowed some players to get close enough to hear a tapcode coming from the hatch. One that translates to no. No. DEAR GOD NO.
Rockstar orchestrated the controversy behind the original GTA
Even though GTA flirts with trolling and has an on-and-off with social commentary, its soulmate is controversy. Appalled politicians, pearl-clutching lawyers, and parents who don't read the rating have all brought GTA and controversy closer, and it seems these two will be together forever. Apparently they have an odd PR campaign to thank, which specifically targeted British members of parliament and let the resulting outrage do the rest.
According to series creators David Jones and Mike Dailly, English publicist (and convicted sex offender) Max Clifford manufactured the controversy behind the original GTA by drawing politicians' attention to its most contentious aspects. This led to furious objections from the MPs that were heavily publicized and widely read. According to Jones, He told us how he would play it, who he would target, what those people targeted would say. Every word he said came true. While Clifford doesn't specifically remember doing any of that, he claims he won't "argue with the claims published in the paper."
You can never be too careful around the GTA world, where investigating rumors can lead to fruitless hours of vain searching or lethal success when you fall off a UFO to your death. Did you mythbust any of these once-rumors yourself? Any others we should know about it? Is it more fun to prove a rumor correct, or invent one of your own and watch the plebes run around like rats on Red Bullr? Tell us in the comments below, you devious little sneak!
Are you itching to get back to carjacking people, jumping over moving trains, and skydiving without a parachute from the comfort of home? Check out our GTA 5 review. Also, I'll leave The GTA 5 "Chiliad Mystery" is ramping up after 3+ years of searching for aliens right here. You might need it later.