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50 Best Homer Simpson Quotes Of All Time


The Quote: “Books are useless! I only ever read one book, “To Kill A Mockingbird,” and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the colour of his skin… but what good does that do me?”

Why We Love It: Homer’s unknowing irony on misleading literary titles is winning; most of all it’s funny, and comes with a giant helping of social commentary.

And he does have a point about the title.


The Quote: “If something’s hard to do, then it’s not worth doing.”

Why We Love It: The antithesis of many revered maxims on hard work, it’s comforting to turn to this when faced with compiling Harvard-standard referencing for your PhD bibliography.


The Quote: “Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs.”

Why We Love It: Who needs a simile when things are best compared to themselves?

Civic Duty

The Quote: “Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.”

Why We Love It: As is the case with a fair wodge of Homer’s aphorisms, this has a nugget of truth to it!

Computer Illiteracy

The Quote: “‘To Start Press Any Key'. Where's the ANY key?”

Why We Love It: ...because we’ve all taken instructions too literally before.

Meeting Aliens

The Quote: “Oh my god, space aliens. Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!”

Why We Love It: An honest admission most folks would take to their deaths, Homer bypasses his conscience for a far funnier exchange with extraterrestrials.

Work Ethic

The Quote: “Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.”

Why We Love It: There’s no sugar coating of advice before it is dispensed to his offspring - his slacker nature is worn with pride akin to something acquired by actual hard graft. Hurrah for honesty!

The Lottery

The Quote: “Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.”

Why We Love It: Is this wry oxymoronic statement, delivered in earnest to his tearaway son, Bart, proof of Homer’s hidden intellectual side? No, probably not.

Classic Catchphrase

The Quote: “D’oh!”

Why We Love It: Homer’s classic go-to phrase captures his doltish nature perfectly, and is adopted for usage in most of his day-to-day activities.

Bonus point! An amusing utterance, D’oh grabbed ahold of popular culture and never lost its grip, going so far as to warrant entry into the OED in 2001.