1. Having too good a day? Relive your childhood movie trauma thanks to Tim Burton.
Forget Jordan Peele's Us, if you want a movie that's really going to eff you up why not go and see the new live-action version of Dumbo? You remember the cartoon, all horrific animal abuse and infant-parent seperation, made all the weirder with that scene with nightmarish pink elephant creatures to represent alcoholism? Who doesn't want to see that in recreated with actual children and a CGI elephant calf. Yes, with Tim Burton directing and Michael Keaton, Danny DeVito, and Eva Green starring in this new Disney movie it's probably going to be objectively "good," but I still think any parent that subjects their child to it should get a stern talking to from the authorities.
Where: Movie theaters
When: March 29
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2. Battle royale comes to Battlefield 5 with Firestorm, but does it even stand a chance against the likes of Apex Legends and Fortnite?
Better late than never, Battlefield 5 is finally receiving its battle royale mode, Firestorm, as part of a free update to the base game next week. Dropping into the new map Halvoy (10 times the size of Battlefield 5’s largest multiplayer map, Hamada), 64 players will compete to the death in squads of four against the ticking clock of an encroaching circle of fire, using tiered weapons, armour, and all manner of land, sea, and air vehicles to achieve victory with a capital “V”. Firestorm’s unique selling point in the battle royale scene, in case you’re wondering, are the same design pillars that sets the Battlefield series apart as a whole; huge destruction, tight squadplay, and first-in-class visual flair, but it’s questionable whether this is enough to restore the game’s foundering playerbase to healthier levels. Regardless, as long as you have a copy of the game, you’ll be able to play Firestorm on Monday, March 25, so jump in and find out if it has what it takes to become your next favourite obsession. Alex Avard
What: Battlefield 5: Firestorm
Where: PC, PS4, Xbox One
When: March 25
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3. What We Do in the Shadows S1 doesn’t have the original cast, but looks drop dead awesome
It might not have Taika Waititi, Jermaine Clement, or Stu, but the trailer for the TV series of What We Do in the Shadows is *finger kiss*. Off-beat humour, awkward silences, and of course the various trials faced by vampires in the 21st Century means that it has the DNA of the movie running through its dead, dried-up veins. It’s built on the central concept spawned by the movie too, featuring new vampires from different parts of the world and a human ‘familiar’ to make sure they don’t go too overboard...as well as provide them with fresh virgins. Specifically, virgins from a LARPing session. Just...wow. The addition of energy vampires too, who can go out into the day and drain energy from humans by basically boring them to death, is genius. Plus it seriously making me think I might have run into some personally. Zoe Delahunty-Light
What: What We Do in the Shadows TV series
When: March 27, 2019
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4. Yoshi's going to distract you from all the political madness with a large serving of cute
It's all a bit of a sadness fest in the news right now, isn't it? Particularly if you live in the UK. But cutting through all politics, the guns of Division 2 and Anthem, and the rock hard gameplay in Sekiro, you can get yourself a slice of happiness with Yoshi's Crafted World this week. Building on the success of the yarn-laden Yoshi's Woolly World, this time around we're going all recycled goods and papercraft. Everything in it is almost sickeningly cute, with Shy Guys literally spotted holding up little paper butterflies. Aww. It mixes up the traditional Yoshi gameplay too, as although your usual challenges and collectibles are there, you'll be able to play through each of the diorama levels from behind, allowing you to see exactly how each level is put together - along with some nice speed run challenges too, regularly featuring our old pal Poochy. Thank the Brexit for Yoshi. Sam Loveridge
What: Yoshi's Crafted World
When: March 29
Where: Nintendo Switch
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5. What’s this… a TV show about video games that doesn’t make us want to run and hide?
Historically, video game adaptations haven’t done the medium any favours and while movies about video games fair slightly better (think Wreck-It Ralph rather than Assassin’s Creed), it’s still a bit of risk sitting down to watch anything about gaming in this day and age. But new TV show Dead Pixels is looking to change that. Created by former games journalist Jon Brown (who can list writing credits for Misfits, Fresh Meat, and Cuban Fury on his CV), Dead Pixels is about a group of friends obsessed with an online RPG called Kingdom Scrolls, and the trailer actually looks really funny and, dare we day it… good. Fingers crossed it’ll give us an entertaining story about gaming, which doesn’t revolve around making fun of gamers and actually makes sense from a playable point of view when it premieres on E4 this week. Lauren O’Callaghan
What: Dead Pixels
When: March 28, 2019
Where: E4 (UK)/TBC (US)
- Dead Pixels is a new comedy from the writer of Peep Show about a fictional online RPG that's +10 funny
Release Radar picks the best games, movies and shows of the next seven days every Monday at 11am GMT.