50 Worst Date Movies

Dead Ringers (1988)

The Bad Date Movie: Jeremy Irons plays a pair of twin gynaecologists pioneering a new tool to be used on mutant women. If that doesn’t spell romance, we don’t know what does.

Impact On Your Evening: A series of long, quizzical looks will be coming the way of whoever picked this one off the shelf.

Fahrenheit 9/11 (2004)

The Bad Date Movie: Taking your other half to see a piece of political rhetoric, no matter how well-intended, is a recipe for trouble. If the two of you disagree on matters, “lively debate” can progress to “slanging match” in the blinking of an eye.

Impact On Your Evening: One of you storming off, labelling the other a “fascist” at the top of your voice. Awkward…

9 1/2 Weeks (1986)

The Bad Date Movie: Mickey Rourke and Kim Basinger re-write the Kama Sutra with their athletic bedroom exploits in this steamy erotic thriller. One to avoid since you’ll never manage to live up to it yourselves.

Impact On Your Evening: A strained back and an unwelcome trip to A & E.

How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days (2003)

The Bad Date Movie: A whole host of gender stereotypes are put on display, resulting in both men and women being shown in the worst possible light. Enough to put you off the opposite sex for a lifetime.

Impact On Your Evening: You’ll be looking for excuses to leave and join your respective mates within minutes.

Leaving Las Vegas (1995)

The Bad Date Movie: Nicolas Cage slowly drinks himself to death in this downbeat romance, that while sweet-natured, is irrecoverably sad. If you’re looking to have a nice, cheerful evening, you should probably look elsewhere.

Impact On Your Evening: Your partner will be keeping a beady eye on just how many drinks you have in the pub afterwards.

(500) Days Of Summer (2009)

The Bad Date Movie: A bittersweet relationship comedy, with an emphasis on the “bitter”, it’s almost impossible to watch this without losing your faith in young, carefree love. Mainly because Zooey Deschanel plays a bit of a bitch…

Impact On Your Evening: Alll those things you thought were cute and kooky about your other half? You’ll be looking straight past those to see if they’re secretly planning on breaking your heart.

Sleeping Dogs (2006)

The Bad Date Movie: Bobcat Goldthwaite’s low-budget comedy explores the impact on a newly engaged woman’s life, when she confesses to giving a dog a blow-job when she was younger. Do we really need to say more?

Impact On Your Evening: You’ll both be wondering what hideous skeletons are lurking in each other’s closets.

Blue Velvet (1986)

The Bad Date Movie: If you’re a David Lynch fan, taking a date to one of his movies is probably a good litmus test for how compatible you are as a couple. However, a gasmask-toting Dennis Hopper might be a little too much, too soon…

Impact On Your Evening: A few awkward questions as to whether you’ve “tried anything like that”.

Breaking Dawn pt. 1 (2011)

The Bad Date Movie: Asking someone to sit through this tedious vampire sulkathon is demanding enough, but Bella’s horrific birthing scene takes things on to a whole new level. Sex will not be on the cards after witnessing that!

Impact On Your Evening: Chances are you’ll be asleep long before the end credits roll.

Happiness (1998)

The Bad Date Movie: Suggest watching this pitch black dramedy to a new boyfriend or girlfriend, and watch as they waltz out of your life without looking back. Warped, deviant relationships might make for provocative viewing, but aren’t exactly conducive to a cosy night in.

Impact On Your Evening: “So, what about that paedophile, eh? He sure had it tough.”