Sure, you could totally pick your favorite gun, find a side arm that fits your style, and tweak the Killstreaks, Deathstreaks, and Perks to your liking, but then you'll just end up doing well. You don't want to do well. You want to be annoying. You want to be the player the other players curse and scream about. You want to be so annoying that you make other players rage quit and write angry comments online about how bad the game's multiplayer is. That's what you want and we're here to help. We've put together a list of not the best, but the most brutally dickish custom classes we've come up with to help ruin other players' good times.
Assault Rifle with Noob tube attached
Secondary Weapon: SMAW
Killstreak: UAV/Ballistic Vests/doesn’t matter, you’ll never get there
Deathstreak: Martyrdom or Dead Man’s Hand for best results
Perk 1: Extreme Conditioning
Perk 2: Blast Shield
Perk 3: Sitrep
How it works: Even though explosives have been nerfed considerably in MW3, it’s still awesome to blow things up. Find your target, time your grenade pin pulls and haul ass straight for the nearest enemy. When you pull the pin on your frag grenade, even if you get shot and killed, the grenade will drop and explode – it’s your own bootlegged Martyrdom. The Extreme Conditioning, Blast Shield, and Sitrep perks will get you in the enemy’s face fast and keep you from being blown apart prematurely by the other team’s traps and explosives. The best way to get a guaranteed kill is to throw a concussion grenade at enemies in a confined area and run in ready to blow, or sneak up from behind to deliver the coup de grace, but the most gratifying kills come when you run head on and blow the other team apart.
Rack up kills by noob-tubing choke points, nading flag captures, and shoving rockets down peoples’ throats with the SMAW, then use your UAV to find your next victims, strap on a Ballistic Vest, and balls to the wall, bum rush a group of enemies. If you managed to die enough (not suicide)before this to earn yourself a Dead Man’s Hand Deathstreak, set that baby off and hope for a multi-kill. Granted, this class isn’t going to do much for your kill/death ratio, but it will sure as hell get some people pretty ticked.
Primary Weapon: Knife
Secondary Weapon: Knife
Lethal: Throwing knife
Killstreak: Support: UAV/Counter UAV/ Advanced UAV
Perk 1: Blind Eye
Perk 2: Assassin
Perk 3: Dead Silence
How it works: Immediately find the darkest, creepiest enclosure in the map – preferably one with as few entrances as possible. It doesn’t matter if it’s on your side or their side, just find it, run to it, go into a corner, plant your Scrambler down, and hide. The perks are set up to make sure that you’re undetectable on radar, meaning no one will ever know that you’re there. Once an enemy wanders in your scrambler will start playing tricks on his radar, making him feel like he has stumbled into a trap. Because he has.
When someone walks in the room immediately throw your knife at them while running in their direction. Once close enough stab them as quickly as possible, pick up their knife, and find a new corner to hide in. Repeat this until they start to wise up on your location, and then simply choose a different building and repeat the process. Before long it’ll be like a horror movie – they’ll be afraid to enter any building or enclosure for fear of the mysterious serial killer lurking in the shadows. Muwhahaha!
Check out page two for three more rude, rude guides...