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Ninjas, Yakuza, and sexually aggressive canines: Deadpool 2’s official synopsis is WILD

If you thought the Bob Ross-inspired Deadpool 2 trailer was balls-to-the-wall insane, you ain’t seen nothing yet. There’s also the official plot synopsis for Deadpool 2 to pore over and, this involving the Merc with a Mouth, it’s no ordinary synopsis. Read on for the most ridiculous movie summary you’ll see all year…

Now listed as ‘Untitled Deadpool Sequel’ which, honestly, is probably a tongue-in-cheek joke poking fun at Avengers 4’s inability to release a title, the synopsis is as follows:

“After surviving a near fatal bovine attack, a disfigured cafeteria chef (Wade Wilson) struggles to fulfill his dream of becoming Mayberry’s hottest bartender while also learning to cope with his lost sense of taste. Searching to regain his spice for life, as well as a flux capacitor, Wade must battle ninjas, the yakuza, and a pack of sexually aggressive canines, as he journeys around the world to discover the importance of family, friendship, and flavor - finding a new taste for adventure and earning the coveted coffee mug title of World’s Best Lover.”

While this synopsis fails to mention the multitude of cast members, such as Domino and Cable, who will be cropping up in the movie, it’s no surprise to see Deadpool take the (silly) road less travelled.

The synopsis – fittingly – is painted in broad strokes to hide most of the main plot – though I’ll bet Deadpool fighting dogs humping his leg will probably be involved somewhere down the line. If nothing else, Ryan Reynolds has probably stolen this plot from the desk of Adam Sandler, so he’s done the world a big ol’ favour.

For more Deadpool 2 content, be sure to feast your eyes on a Thanksgiving-themed Deadpool 2 poster, and the movie’s very first Easter egg.

Image: Fox

I'm the Entertainment Writer here at GamesRadar+, focusing on news, features, and interviews with some of the biggest names in film and TV. On-site, you'll find me marveling at Marvel and providing analysis and room temperature takes on the newest films, Star Wars and, of course, anime. Outside of GR, I love getting lost in a good 100-hour JRPG, Warzone, and kicking back on the (virtual) field with Football Manager. My work has also been featured in OPM, FourFourTwo, and Game Revolution.