Secret santa gifts for Kratos, Mario, and more
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Spread that holiday cheer
'Tis the holiday season, that wonderful time of year where grandma knits you a horrendous sweater and mom talks about your obsession with "those darn video games." Gift getting (and, according to some, gift giving) is one of the greatest parts of Christmas/Hanukkah/similar celebratory dates. So we found ourselves wondering: If we were to host a secret santa party for video game characters, what would be the perfect gifts (under $20!) to get them? Here's what we came up with.
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Solid Snake – Nicotine patch
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Cloud Strife – Hair gel
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Johnny Sasaki – Pepto-Bismol
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Kratos – Throat lozenge
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Glados – Plush companion cube
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Pac-Man – Dentures
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Donkey Kong – Cheesy piano tie
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Bowser – Turtle Wax
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Bayonetta – Shampoo (Pert Plus, specifically)
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Kirby – Breath mints
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Max Payne – A new Hawaiian shirt
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Dante from DmC – White hair dye
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Marcus Fenix – Shakeweight
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The cast of Far Cry 3 – Beer Pong table
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Sweet Tooth – Truck Nuts
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Vaas – Dictionary (for finding the definition of insanity)
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Johnny Cage – A Mirror (that laughs at you)
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Ethan Mars – A copy of It's a Wonderful Life
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Link – Bigger wallet
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Mario – Cake
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Lara Croft – BBC's Planet Earth DVD complete set
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Chuck Greene – Duct tape
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Gordon Freeman – Eyewear retainer
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Happy holidays
It'd be easy to come up with gift ideas for just about any video game character--so we're wondering, what would you get some of your favorites? Let us know in the comments below!
For more holiday cheer, check out our game-free gift guide and 10 tips for holiday shoppers.
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ironrafael - December 29, 2012 10:05 p.m.
Thought santa would give a bottle of Scotch for Max Payne. -
stephanhoefer - December 27, 2012 2:23 a.m.
Isaac Clarke: Band-Aid brand Band-aids & Ozonol Princess Peach: mace (Pepper Spray) Sweet Tooth: Anger Management Spyro the Dragon: Barbeque Crash Bandicoot: Trampoline or Ritalin Lara Croft: a Map Turok: Bigger Guns Scorpion: YMCA 1 Year Membership Rayman: Prosthetic Limbs -
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cheryljansen8 - December 25, 2012 4:09 p.m.
Many of us do not believe that he could work and profit from the Internet. I personally, at first I did not believe it . but when I made $80 /hr I knew it was not difficult. you wont forgive yourself if you don't check it out...ChristmasGift7.Mel7.CoM -
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BladedFalcon - December 24, 2012 10:19 a.m.
Wouldn't Glados prefer a new test subject she could torture and try to kill? XD Anyway, this was fantastic, and pretty damn funny! -
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BladedFalcon - December 24, 2012 12:12 p.m.
China! :D *Runs the hell away from the inevitable wrath of the politically correct society... And the Chinese.* -
LordzOfChaos - December 24, 2012 12:22 a.m.
Some of these made me laugh pretty hard, well done -
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scott-david-betson - December 23, 2012 12:19 p.m.
you missed Nathan Drake and hed possibly want a map to El "goddamn" Dorado -
jackthemenace - December 23, 2012 10:43 a.m.
Nice, did you come up with all of these yourself? I mean, admittedly, a couple of them I thought were a little farfetched, but most- especially towards the start- I really enjoyed. Also, it's nice to see content on a Sunday, so thanks for that ^_^
Showing 1-19 of 19 comments