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53 year-old Ivan Drago set to play Jason Statham's son in Uwe Boll's Dungeon Siege sequel

Good old Uwe Boll. If the despised movie man isn’t making video game flicks where kids get shot in awesome slo-mo, he’s persuading Oscar-winning Sir Ben Kingsley to star in Bloodrayne. What a guy. In terms of celluloid wackiness, though, we think he’s just topped all previous shitty movie moments. Because 53 year-old Dolph Lundgren (aka Rocky IV’s Ivan Drago) will play 38 year-old Jason Statham’s son in a sequel to the Dungeon Siege-inspired In the Name of the King.

Although In the Name of the King 2 is ditching the Dungeon Siege name (which is strange considering there’s a new game coming out on 360 and PS3), at least it’ll have the former He-Man actor playing the Transporter’s nipper. Apparently it’ll involve time-travelling shenanigans of some sort.


Above: He still must break you

Here’s an eloquent description of the film from Raging Boll himself, taken from a Blogtalk Radio interview: “We have Dolph Lundgren and one night he gets attacked by ninjas in his house and falls with the ninjas into a vortex back in time. And then it turns out it's like 50 years after the first part In the Name of the King ended, and everybody is dead, Jason Statham and everybody who was in the first part, got wiped out. He was basically sent into the future, he's the son of Jason Statham, and he was sent into the future, brought up in an orphanage, because the parents felt that they would all die.”

Aaaand breathe.

We ain’t exactly Boll’s biggest fans (seeing as he’s pretty much the worst director in existence). But honestly, if you can’t grow a humorous bone and appreciate the full comedic significance of Ivan Drago falling into a vortex while simultaneously kicking ninja ass, then we feel sorry for you.


Above: Here’s Ray Liotta acting the shit out of the original film

Dolph, meanwhile, has described Boll in an interview with Screen Junkies as “the evil genius of directing”.


Above: Genius at work

Now to wrap things up, and for no particular reason, here’s a video of the late, great Leslie Nielsen getting his kung-fu on…



What do you mean 'we're supposed to be writing about games'?

Source: Joystiq

Dec 3, 2010


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11 comments

  • Zepaw - December 6, 2010 2:55 a.m.

    The first movie was so painfully bad 15 minutes in I skipped to the end. It was so bad I had to see how the pile of filth ended but would not have survived actually watching the middle part. It was a good choice because I got to see Ray Liotta acting the shit out of it as you so well put it. I had no Boll bias either, Dungeon Siege 1 was my first, and still only, self torture of watching a Boll film.
  • Stabby_Joe - December 3, 2010 5:48 p.m.

    He's doing this on purpose, he won't stop until he's become as "beloved" as Ed Wood or Tommy Wiseau.
  • Clovin64 - December 3, 2010 4:45 p.m.

    Ivan Drago falling into a vortex while fighting ninjas? Only Uwe Boll would pull off some crazy shit like that!
  • sixboxes - December 3, 2010 4:45 p.m.

    "Raging Boll"... loved it XD Lundgren I can understand, but doesn't Jason Statham still have a career? What kind of paycheque is Boll floating him to get him to still wallow in this garbage?
  • ThatsWhatSheSaid - December 3, 2010 4:16 p.m.

    Uwe Boll is like the modern day Ed Wood, except he doest have the Innocence, Charm or Likability, and u wont see Johnny Depp playin him in a future biopic ... maybe sum1 on his level like Gary Glitter wud play him
  • FauxFurry - December 3, 2010 3:33 p.m.

    I couldn't help but think of Will Sasso's impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger describing his new movie to E! Television when I read Uwe Boll formulating his plan to carry out his latest cinematic equivalent of a war crime. http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/will-sasso-as-arnold-schwarzenegger-in-stolen-identity-3/e80e10400737e12a710ee80e10400737e12a710e-282728334778?q=Stolen%20Identity%203
  • Turboash - December 3, 2010 3:23 p.m.

    xinwen... I know I sure must was looking forward to Christmas, and Quality is my Dignity as well! ... you donut-punching shit-dick.
  • CanadianBeaverHunter - December 3, 2010 3:17 p.m.

    I can't resist Drago vs Ninjas.
  • Distress - December 3, 2010 3:15 p.m.

    RIP Leslie Nielsen, we will shirley miss him
  • flabslapper - December 3, 2010 3:09 p.m.

    I believe xinwen has said it best with their Christmas shopping comment because WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN though now I'm going to have to watch this because Dolph Lungren is awesome
  • Spacem0nkey77 - December 3, 2010 2:34 p.m.

    Thats how Leslie Nielson really died!

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