Confessions Of A Shopaholic
Takers
Hayden Christensen fell on hard times post -Star Wars .
So hard, apparently, that he had to sell his neck to make do.
Sex & The City 2
Sex & The City was always a series concerned with female empowerment.
So we can't help but feel they're missing the point a little with a movie poster that is so concerned with turning back the years that it turns Kim Cattrall into a post- Dangerous Michael Jackson and Sarah Jessica Parker into an 18-year-old.
Knight & Day
A lot's made over Tom Cruise's admirable dedication to performing his own stunts, so quite why this detached, velocity-draining monstrosity was created is beyond us.
How NOT to manufacture poster action 101.
Knight & Day (Again)
Airbrushed Diaz to cheekbone-evaporating levels? Check.
Bored designer throwing paint at the background because they can't think of anything creative to super-impose? Check.
We Own The Night
Throw in a stock background skyline, cardboard cut-out poses, and some terrible shadowing, and ta da! Job done.
One Missed Call
How to sell the truly terrifying nature of a horror film...
Well why not just photoshop nostrils instead of eyebrows. Because that's, erm, scary?
Postal
Hoo boy.
Where to begin?
We know Postal was always meant to provoke. But the most offensive thing about this politically incorrect bodge job?
The 'Introduction to Photoshop 101' afterglow-tastic aura effect they've added to every character.
Blonde Ambition
Jessica Simpson there, airbrushed into a scene that apparently pits her as a 100ft woman.
One girlish roll around on the grass and she'd crush every bystander about.
Bangkok Dangerous
Trust Nic Cage to appear in one of the most baffling, ludicrously inexplicable movie posters ever created.
Who needs logic when you can have bullet holes FOR NO REASON, an arm reaching into a coat with all the physics of the TARDIS, and a gun that's been photoshopped out because... erm.
