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The Usual Suspects (1995)
Life Of Brian (1979)
The Movie: A man living in the same time as Jesus is mistaken for the messiah, acquires a cult following and is eventually crucified.
The Tech: PA system.
Alright, it wouldn't have entirely ruined the movie, but crystal clear audio would have robbed it of one of its best jokes.
The sermon on the mount being blasted out via enormous speakers would have left us in no doubt that cheesemakers were never really part of God’s plan, apart from in the production, distribution and promotion of cheese.
Psycho (1960)
The Movie: A secretary on the run stays at the remote Bates Motel, and has an unforgettable encounter with owner Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins) and his mother.
The Tech: Pop up tent.
Need to get away? Don’t fancy staying at accommodation that sets every nerve you have on edge?
The solution to this particular dilemma is, of course, the pop up tent. It’s the home you carry with you, and can even be put up in a thunderstorm.
Perfect for avoiding being brutally murdered during your ablutions.
Superman (1978)
The Movie: Unassuming journalist Clark Kent has a secret: he’s actually Superman, a flying, bullet-proof hero sent to Earth from a dying planet.
The Tech: CCTV.
Superman’s secret identity would have lasted precisely .02 seconds in the modern world, with several hundred CCTV cameras watching Clark entering phone boxes and leaving them as Superman with alarming regularity.
The Blair Witch Project (1999)
The Movie: A group of student filmmakers head into the Maryland woods to uncover the story of local legend the Blair Witch. They become lost, disoriented and, eventually, dead.
The Tech: Sat-nav.
All it would have taken to save the snot-nosed documentary filmmakers from their doom would have been a sat nav.
They could have wandered freely, knowing they’d always be able to find their way home, or else been directed to a different wood altogether after putting in the wrong postcode.
Moulin Rouge! (2001)
The Movie: The story of the romance between Ewan McGregor’s love-struck poet Christian and Nicole Kidman’s lusty courtesan Satine, who succumbs to tuberculosis.
The Tech: Antibiotics.
With little more than a few pills, Seline would have been back on her feet in no time, whereupon she could have settled into a life of petty arguments and domestic disharmony with the love of her life.
Forrest Gump (1994)
The Movie: After having his proposal rejected by the love of his life, lovable multi-millionaire ping-pong star and Vietnam veteran Tom hanks goes for an epic run across the USA.
The Tech: The Segway.
The personal vehicle of choice for wealthy Americans in a hurry, the Segway would have make Forrest’s cross-country marathon much easier on his trainers, although arguably a lot less inspirational.
The Italian Job (1969)
The Movie: Michael Caine leads a bunch of likely lads as they undertake a daring, ingenious robbery in Turin.
The Tech: ABS steering.
Made precisely to prevent the sort of driving disaster that lead to the literal cliff hanger at the end of the film, ABS would have robbed The Italian Job of its iconic ending, and had us all thinking that actually, crime does pay.
Memphis Belle (1990)
The Movie: It’s World War Two, and a gang of photogenic young American airmen risk life and limb piloting their bomber aircraft into the heart of enemy territory.
The Tech: Drone aircraft.
Instead of all that overwrought emotion, bravery in the face of almost certain death and Harry Connick Jnr, Memphis Belle would instead have been a ten minute short about the deadly, devastating accuracy of unmanned aerial vehicles.
Titanic (1997)
The Movie: The biggest boat ever built heads out on its maiden voyage, only to smash into an iceberg and sink before it reaches its destination.
The Tech: Radar.
All it would have taken to avert tragedy was a little bleeping box pinging signals out into the darkness. Jack and Rose could have lived happily ever after, and we wouldn’t have had to endure three hours of doomed romance soundtracked by Celine Dion.
