The Top 7... Worst Parts of Best Games

The most criminal imperfections of all time

Words: Charlie Barratt on June 16, 2008

Nothing's perfect. Stare closely enough at anything - even a masterpiece - and you're bound to find flaws sooner or later. They might be small. They might be insignificant. They might not detract from the overall quality of the piece at all...

Except when they really, really do. With these seven games, in fact, you don't need to stare. Their flaws are so huge, so obvious, so frustrating and so effing obnoxious that you can't help but notice them, despise them and wonder how the damn things got included in the first place.

Do we usually end up loving these games anyway? Yes. Would we love them a lot more if they lanced these particular features like the foul, cancerous boils they truly are? Oh hell yes.

The best parts: Beloved Disney characters; beloved Final Fantasy characters; successfully merging the two; gorgeous animation; Hollywood-grade voice acting; genuinely heartfelt story.

The WORST part:          GUMMI SHIP 

This selection shouldn't stir up much controversy, as you probably saw it coming from the moment you read the headline.

Everyone hates the Gummi Ship. Everyone. People who try the games for a few hours hate the Gummi Ship. People who worship and adore the entire series hate the Gummi Ship. People who cosplay as Heartless and draw fan art of Sora kissing Riku (yes, they exist) hate the Gummi Ship. People who have never even played Kingdom Hearts hate the Gummi Ship.

Why? Because the Gummi Ship sections are as completely unnecessary as they are completely unavoidable. After just one taste of the mind-numbing and repetitive "Star Fox for Dummies" gameplay, you'll never want to see that blocky jalopy again... but you'll have to, because Kingdom Hearts forces you to travel by Gummi Ship dozens upon dozens of times. Sure, you can customize it, but that's about as appealing an opportunity as designing the stationary for your math homework. Besides, you usually just ended up with junk like this:


Ha. Ha.

Dishonorable mention: No matter how big a fan of Disney and The Little Mermaid you are, we dare you to make it through all five of Kingdom Heart II's Atlantica "musical challenges" without wanting to tear your own ear drums out. The video clip below might be enough to cause irreparable harm:



"Swim along, just join in the song...
A musical for everyone to have a lot of finny fun--" *GUNSHOT*

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Platforms:

Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, Wii, PC, PSP, DS, Xbox, GameCube

Topics:

Top 7

103 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
  • Sjoeki

    Sjoeki  - 6 months, 4 weeks ago  - Report

    I hated the part where you had to get the licenses for planes in GTA San Andreas, I stopped playing the game at that point, months later a buddy of mine helped me get the licenses and I found out that you almost never had to fly a plane in the game, damn that sucked hard!!
  • Darkhawk

    Darkhawk  - 8 months, 3 weeks ago  - Report

    I would like to submit the save point lacking Phazon Mines in the original Metroid Prime for this feature. The only point in the entire game where you can go over an hour against some of the toughest enemies with no opportunity to save.
  • baconHalo

    baconHalo  - 11 months, 1 week ago  - Report

    i like Wind Waker and water temples in Zelda games. haven't played this terrible Majora's Mask one though.. i also very much like the Flood, but somehow Reach was better than Halo 3... maybe it's a coincidence that there's no Flood and it's awesome
  • Zeb364

    Zeb364  - 1 year ago  - Report

    I love the blue shell pics. The Muhammed Ali one was freakin hilarious.
  • mrm1138

    mrm1138  - 1 year, 2 months ago  - Report

    I have a friend who is exceptionally good at avoiding blue shells (by which I mean he slows down and lets others take them for him and then retaking first, much like people have been suggesting). Of course, it's often been the bane of my existence (ofttimes thanks to the very same friend).
  • kurtbarber

    kurtbarber  - 1 year, 2 months ago  - Report

    George Bush would proably dodge that stupid thing like he did with the shoe
  • EwoksTasteLikeChicken

    EwoksTasteLikeChicken  - 1 year, 2 months ago  - Report

    I hate the flood sooooo much. I mean, I play Halo to fight aliens on alien planets, not to shoot a frickin' zombie.
  • spongejerk89

    spongejerk89  - 1 year, 3 months ago  - Report

    Wow, I always loved the Flood levels on Halo 1. They were in 2 of my 3 favourite levels from it: Assault on the Control Room, The Library, and The Silent Cartographer.
  • Aletheon

    Aletheon  - 1 year, 3 months ago  - Report

    My friend spent hours on the Gummi ship screen. He loved them. I guess not "everyone" hated it.
  • BobberyFan98

    BobberyFan98  - 1 year, 3 months ago  - Report

    Amen for the one about Halo! THE FLOOD SHOULD JUST GO DIE IN A FIRE.
  • Zepaw

    Zepaw  - 1 year, 4 months ago  - Report

    "Socializing is why I quit GTA4."

    This. I keep wanting to return and finish the game, but I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU COUSIN!!
  • EricGirasole123

    EricGirasole123  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    Christ almighty the Blue shell 0_0 But it can be avoided just race good and keep them mushrooms and you'l be ok I suppose if you tap B hard enough yet Nintendo ARE truly screwing you over when your about to cross the finish line in an Online Race Your delighted becuase you finally won something that took ages getting Friend Codes of people and THEN finally your about to win and the Mutha'Fudga gets you at the last second
  • Darkmessiah24

    Darkmessiah24  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    Well said about GTA IV, Mass Effect & especially Dead Rising.
  • ComradeKhani

    ComradeKhani  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    strangely enough, now that mass effect 2 is out, i miss the elevators.
  • Trilby

    Trilby  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    One game that punishes you for winning as much as Mario Kart?
    Definitely Madden. Technically it doesn't punish you, but its 'make every single game a close game' system hacks me off.
  • hanktherapper

    hanktherapper  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    Socializing is why I quit GTA4.
  • buro13

    buro13  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    Dude I could not stop laughing for the mario kart spiky turtle. I f'n cried....Classic! 2am and I am laughing like a mad man and my wife is like "WTF go to sleep!"
  • sniperscope

    sniperscope  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    The Blue Shell pictures are EPIC.
  • YuGiOhisbetterthanMagic

    YuGiOhisbetterthanMagic  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    i love the water temple, all yall just a bunch of pansies.
  • KrazyGamer

    KrazyGamer  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    The Flood.... *shutters*
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