Skip to main content
GamesRadar+ GamesRadar+ The Games, Movies, TV & Comics You Love
flag of UK
UK
flag of US
US
flag of Canada
Canada
flag of Australia
Australia
Sign in
  • View Profile
  • Sign out
  • Games
  • TV
  • Movies
  • Hardware
  • Video
  • News
  • Reviews
  • Guides
  • Deals
  • More
    • PS5
    • Xbox Series X
    • Nintendo Switch
    • Nintendo Switch 2
    • PC
    • Platforms
    • Tabletop Gaming
    • Comics
    • Toys & Collectibles
    • Newsarama
    • Retro Gamer
    • Newsletters
    • About us
    • Features
Total Film
Gaming Magazines
Gaming Magazines
Why subscribe?
  • Subscribe from just £3
  • Takes you closer to the games, movies and TV you love
  • Try a single issue or save on a subscription
  • Issues delivered straight to your door or device
From$12
Subscribe now
Trending
  • Gamescom 2025 schedule
  • Gamescom
  • Battlefield 6
  • New Games for 2025
Don't miss these
CloverPit
Roguelike Games This Balatro-style roguelike is Localthunk's nightmare, because it swaps Poker for a literal slot machine to really simulate that gambling feel and its Steam Next Fest demo is dangerously addictive
Bioshock Infinite screenshot showing Elizabeth about to hit someone with a book
PC Gaming If "good is the new bad" in games, flawed experiments won't have time to grow into future GOTYs
SNES (Super Famicom) console sitting on grey sofa with NES cart inserted and sad face attached to front.
Retro The BBC committed a retro console cardinal sin live on TV, but I actually forgive them
Another Crab's Treasure trailer screenshot showing a cartoon-like crab with wide, vein-y eyes and a painful expression
Games Echoing Nier's Yoko Taro, Peak devs blast "puritan" group behind recent Steam and Itch game takedowns: "It'd be foolish to assume that any game is safe"
Death Stranding 2
Action Games After Metal Gear Solid 5 made sparing or killing enemies so important, I'm disappointed Death Stranding 2 wasted its most interesting mechanic
Silent Hill 2
Horror Games Players debate characters' looks in everything from Marvel Rivals to The Witcher 3, but Silent Hill 2 devs sent them a warning 24 years ago: "Maria was sexier when we first started out, but her plunging neckline gave us too many technical problems"
A cropped screenshot from Undertale, showing Frisk and Sans standing in Grillby's in Snowdin.
RPGs 17 years after it was released, I'm tracing Undertale and Deltarune's origins back to Toby Fox's spooky Earthbound mod
The key art for the full release of Deltarune
RPGs Deltarune fans think they've found the boss fight Toby Fox's family described as a "cry for help," and yep, it's the stuff nightmares are made of
lea seydoux as fragile smoking a cigarette
Games Hideo Kojima learned "so many ways to kill people" in training, says it's "kind of sad" many devs "don't know how to dismantle a gun or shoot a gun" despite making military games
Mega Victreebel stops two people from escaping in a Pokemon Legends Z-A trailer
Pokemon Great, now I'm desperate for Pokemon to make a Resident Evil-like – and it had better go full Lavender town
Borderlands 4 trailer screenshot of Rafa around a bonfire
Borderlands The new Borderlands 4 trailer feels like an extreme parody of the 2025 games industry: a (literal) bloodbath caused by board members killing cool ideas to save money
Donkey Kong Bananza screenshot shows DK looking shocked, with his hands in the air and eyes popping out of his head.
Donkey Kong Nintendo is probably regretting those Switch 2 mouse controls as players flock to Donkey Kong Bananza's artist mode to create penises and other cursed sculptures
Atari 400 Mini on woodgrain desk connected to Dough Spectrum Black OLED monitor and Pac-Man on screen.
Retro This tiny Atari console is naturally great for Pac-Man, but I use it to play one of the most cursed retro games from the '80s
High Fructose
Roguelike Games I broke this roguelike FPS Steam Next Fest demo wide open once I combined its gritty freerunning with a gun that spams pandas
Lilith Walther sits in front of the Nightmare Kart arcade cabinet at the Arcade Commons workshop
Games Mass layoffs, studio closures, and the live-service graveyard are no match for the legally distinct Nightmare Kart arcade cabinet
  1. Games
  2. Strategy

How Fox News would probably reinterpret the most innocent and wholesome of games (as utter filth)

Features
By David Houghton published 14 May 2012

Turns out Tetris is basically vile

When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Here’s how it works.

Poorly researched. Biased. Hysterical. Fear-mongering. All of these words and more could be chosen completely at random and for no particular reason to start an article discussing the tabloid media's treatment of pretty much any pastime it does not understand.

But gamers have a special relationship with Fox News. The station has been synonymous with misguided game-bashing for years now, and certainly no stranger to using skewed reinterpretations of the actual facts of in-game content in order to make a flailing pseudo-point.

So I got thinking. Just how far could that kind of crazy tabloid thinking go in order to twist innocent game content into something far darker? So I had a bit more of a think, and I came up with the following Fox News inspired versions of some of gaming's most creative and wholesome luminaries. And then I scared the crap out of myself with how easily all of this could happen.

Enjoy!

Page 1 of 7
Page 1 of 7
Pikmin

Pikmin

A gamer would say: Tiny astronauts! Magic plant men! Garden based RTS!

Fox News would say: The player is tasked with rousing a mindless, angry mob (with levels of aggression designated by skin colour) to do its bidding, and then proceeds to lead those followers into violence in order to enforce his or her will upon the surrounding environment. Private property is stolen and destroyed, and animals are tormented and killed. Success depends on the player growing the numbers of his or her gang into a small army, in order to do as much damage as possible within a set time limit before leaving the area in ruins.

Page 2 of 7
Page 2 of 7
Super Mario Galaxy

Super Mario Galaxy

A gamer would say: Gravity-bending Mario in space! GODDAMN GRAVITY-BENDING MARIO IN SPAAAACE!

Fox News would say: Cast as an obsessed blue-collar worker, the player actively engages in a long and elaborate attempt to sabotage a royal marriage. This campaign of terror by the determined, single-minded loner protagonist results in the deaths of hundreds, and culminates in a horrific catastrophe which is only averted by the self-sacrifice of countless more innocents. Nevertheless, the players character is deemed a hero.

Page 3 of 7
Page 3 of 7
Animal Crossing

Animal Crossing

A gamer would say: Dogs playing guitars! Digging for fossils! Sleepy villages! Communicative fun!

Fox News would say: In this supposedly innocent game, said by some of its supporters to even be educational, the player learns nothing more than depravity, degeneracy, and isolationist thinking. The lead character is a human who has decided to turn his or her back on their own humanity, rejecting their own species in order to run away to the feral wilderness and form bestial relationships with wild animals instead. Various touchscreens and motion control devices allow the player to enjoy these crimes against nature with sickening levels of tactile realism. Early stages in the game also require the player to take a job with a local racketeer.

Page 4 of 7
Page 4 of 7
Jet Set Radio

Jet Set Radio

A gamer would say: Blue skies! Cool music! Rollerblades and spray paint!

Fox News would say: Less a game, more an interactive gangland training manual, Jet Set Radio teaches impressionable youngsters everything they need to know to become a real menace to society. Playing as the same sort of impressionable, disaffected loner teen this game hopes to groom* with its sugar-coated message of anarchy, the player is plunged into a bright, colourfully cool cartoon depiction of crime and antisocial behaviour. Jet Set Radio cynically draws in its young audience by way of vibrant Saturday morning presentation, but what is contained with it is certainly no Flintstones. Heck, it makes even those Mighty Morphin Powered Rangers look tame.

Through the violently named Beat character, players will learn the basics of how to start a small street gang, before taking the fight to bigger rival groups in an ever escalating battle for turf. Theyll learn how to dominate through intimidation. Theyll oust rivals from their homes by force, claiming them as their own via defacement, using graffiti tags promoting violence and anarchy.

Also, the soundtrack contains a barrage of aggressive Hip Hop and Rock. And we all know what that means.

*Just like a paedophile!

Page 5 of 7
Page 5 of 7
Tetris

Tetris

A gamer would say: Just one more go.

Fox News would say: Literally put into the hands of children since 1989, this might at first seem like an innocent block-based puzzler. An enriching, geometric problem-solving game, maybe. Thats what the cunning minds at Nintendo want you to think. But dont be fooled. This is a game in which the most epic win is achieved by the slipping of a long, straight block into a long straight hole. In reality, Tetris could not be a more aggressive, sexually-charged celebration of misogyny if it tried.

Page 6 of 7
Page 6 of 7
Psychonauts

Psychonauts

A gamer would say: Tim Schafer! Funniest platformer ever! Why is there no sequel!?

Fox News would say: A wayward teen leaves behind his loving family in order to engage in mind-bending, psychedelic experiments with a group of freaks and misfits along the way to subverting and destroying the healthy American institution of summer camp. The game promotes such dangerous activities as wilful engagement in hallucinatory experiences and anti-authoritarian thinking. The entire work is clearly nothing more than a thinly-disguised advocation for drug use as a means for slackers to escape the responsibilities of a productive life.

Page 7 of 7
Page 7 of 7
CATEGORIES
PC Gaming Wii-u Nintendo PlayStation Xbox Platforms
PRODUCTS
Pikmin 3 Animal Crossing Jet Set Radio Pikmin 2 Psychonauts Super Mario Galaxy Tetris
David Houghton
David Houghton
Long-time GR+ writer Dave has been gaming with immense dedication ever since he failed dismally at some '80s arcade racer on a childhood day at the seaside (due to being too small to reach the controls without help). These days he's an enigmatic blend of beard-stroking narrative discussion and hard-hitting Psycho Crushers.
See more PC Gaming Features
Read more
CloverPit
This Balatro-style roguelike is Localthunk's nightmare, because it swaps Poker for a literal slot machine to really simulate that gambling feel and its Steam Next Fest demo is dangerously addictive
Bioshock Infinite screenshot showing Elizabeth about to hit someone with a book
If "good is the new bad" in games, flawed experiments won't have time to grow into future GOTYs
SNES (Super Famicom) console sitting on grey sofa with NES cart inserted and sad face attached to front.
The BBC committed a retro console cardinal sin live on TV, but I actually forgive them
Another Crab's Treasure trailer screenshot showing a cartoon-like crab with wide, vein-y eyes and a painful expression
Echoing Nier's Yoko Taro, Peak devs blast "puritan" group behind recent Steam and Itch game takedowns: "It'd be foolish to assume that any game is safe"
Death Stranding 2
After Metal Gear Solid 5 made sparing or killing enemies so important, I'm disappointed Death Stranding 2 wasted its most interesting mechanic
A cropped screenshot from Undertale, showing Frisk and Sans standing in Grillby's in Snowdin.
17 years after it was released, I'm tracing Undertale and Deltarune's origins back to Toby Fox's spooky Earthbound mod
Latest in Strategy
A mech firing a machine gun in the desert in Menace
Menace is an XCOM-Warhammer hybrid that makes turn-based strategy feel like an immersive sim, and for the first time in my life I'm playing a game that seems made for me
Heroes of Might and Magic: Olden Era artwork showing a beautiful fantasy city
Playing Heroes of Might and Magic: Olden Era has turned me into a Dungeon devotee, and I can't help but feel like I'm already seeing a strategy classic in the making
Chip 'n Clawz vs. The Brainoids alien and machine factory designs
31 years later, XCOM creator Julian Gollop says strategy games are still "where my heart lies" and he wants to make them "more accessible and immersive" – his latest attempt is out today with co-op and Pikmin vibes
Gnomes art of gnome holding a bloody knife
Paying Valve $108,000 just to be on Steam is "totally worth it," says dev of roguelike strategy game made in 10 months which has now earned over $360,000
dawn of war 4 screenshot showing orks
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War 4's four campaigns are all "bigger than the campaign in the first Dawn of War," and thanks to the RTS's branching missions you won't even see all of it in one run
Dawn of War 4
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War 4 is real, and the devs seem keen to wash the bad taste of the last RTS out of everyone's mouths "with classic Dawn of War gameplay"
Latest in Features
Metal Gear Solid 5 showing Snake and Ocelot looking to the horizon in front of more soldiers
10 years later, Metal Gear Solid 5 remains a masterpiece that was never going to live up to its own hype
Dogtooth
The new Yorgos Lanthimos movie is getting rave first reactions out of Venice Film Festival, but I think it's worth revisiting his breakout feature Dogtooth before Bugonia hits theaters this fall
Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2 Legacy of the Forge DLC showing Henry and two allies standing looking down
I built a home and ran a business in Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2's next DLC, and the added role-playing guarantees I'll spend another 70 hours in my current game of the year
D&D Player's Handbook laid out on a wooden surface
Will romantasy be the next great crossover for Dungeons & Dragons? Fourth Wing could be the perfect D&D setting, if you ask me
Jurassic Park: Survival
Jurassic Park: Survival has quietly been 35 years in the making, and it's taking us back to where it all began
The Knight holds blade in front of his head as darkness swirls in key art for Hollow Knight, used in Edge Magazine's Hollow Knight Time Extend feature
8 years on, Hollow Knight is still an extraordinary achievement – but can Silksong live up to the hype?
  1. Kaser clad in black and Victor in white clash swords in Lost Soul Aside
    1
    Lost Soul Aside review: "We (don't) have Final Fantasy Versus 13 at home"
  2. 2
    Hell is Us review: "The lack of waypoints and explicit objectives is a double-edged magical sword that pulls me deep into its harsh world"
  3. 3
    Shuten Order review: "The Danganronpa creator's new multi-genre mystery feels like a forgotten DS cult classic I would have been obsessed with"
  4. 4
    The Rogue Prince of Persia review: "I roguelike but don't roguelove this freerunner – there's just not enough to stand out"
  5. 5
    Shinobi: Art of Vengeance review: "So close to being to a pitch-perfect revival of a classic series, but just can't quite line up the killing blow"
  1. Jacob Elordi as the monster in Guillermo del Toro's Frankenstein
    1
    Frankenstein review: "A classy, if somewhat safe, adaptation"
  2. 2
    Weapons review: "A twisted fairytale that bests Barbarian"
  3. 3
    The Fantastic Four: First Steps review: "An occasionally thrilling heroic adventure that sits safely within a B-tier MCU range"
  4. 4
    Superman review: "A triumphant reinvention and a promising start for the DCU"
  5. 5
    Jurassic World Rebirth Review: "An unscary sequel that needed a little more time in amber"
  1. John Cena as Peacemaker holds a gun to the head of a different John Cena as Peacemaker in Peacemaker season 2.
    1
    Peacemaker season 2 review: "Darker and sadder than the first year, but there's still a lot of fun to be had with the 11th Street Kids."
  2. 2
    Wednesday season 2 part 1 review: "Complex and exciting but weighed down by too many subplots"
  3. 3
    Alien: Earth review: "Arguably the franchise's strongest outing since James Cameron's Aliens"
  4. 4
    King of the Hill season 14 review: "Hank Hill himself has evolved into a much more open and accepting person"
  5. 5
    Eyes of Wakanda review: "A creative premise shortchanged by the runtime and Marvel bloat"

GamesRadar+ is part of Future US Inc, an international media group and leading digital publisher. Visit our corporate site.

  • About Us
  • Contact Future's experts
  • Terms and conditions
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies policy
  • Advertise with us
  • Review guidelines
  • Write for us
  • Accessibility Statement
  • Careers

© Future US, Inc. Full 7th Floor, 130 West 42nd Street, New York, NY 10036.

Please login or signup to comment

Please wait...