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Stars of the next Pokemon Movie revealed

Feast your eyes on the foxes on this page, for they are the very first fifth generation Pokemon to poke their heads above the tall grass around Game Freak’s Genetically Modified Pokemon Breeding Farm. (What? Did you actually think the affronts to nature that are Abomasnow and Nosepass came into existence organically?)


Above: Here’s a trailer

Let’s begin with the smaller and cuter of the two – the smirking fox creature below with furniture stand-calibre legs and a nose that could cut diamonds. This fellow is named Zorua, a Dark Fox Pokemon who gives the impression that Butterfrees wouldn’t melt in his mouth. This, plainly, isn’t true. Although his physical appearance isn’t much to cross your legs about (he stands at a paltry 0.7 metres high and weighs just 12.5 kilograms – even a waif-like crayon-waver is more substantial than that), Zorua has the potential to deliver more bad news than the Bad News Bear’s weekly newsletter, ‘This Week In Bad News’.

The trouble, in particular, lies with Zorua’s evolved form, Zoroark. The name’s a portmanteau of ‘zorro’ – Spanish for ‘fox’ – and ‘dark’. Expect it to be changed to ‘Zorodark’ or equivalent upon the games’ western release. Although very little is known about his in-game statistics, we’ve been able to gain a little insight into his potential abilities thanks to a short trailer promoting the upcoming thirteenth(!) Pokemon movie, now called Ruler of Illusions: Zoroark.

Oh, you thought Suicune, Entei and Raikou were the movies’ poster boys? Hey, it’s an easy mistake-a to make-a. After all, the new trailer does begin with the Legendary bow-wows wreaking destruction on a downtown suburb. Tidal waves, thunder, firestorms – all of that stuff. What’s their problem? Well, maybe they don’t have one – maybe they’re not even in the movie at all, in fact. In one critical scene, we see Ash and his gang confront the Entei, which transforms first into a Suicune and then into a Raikou, right in front of their eyes. Just in case that didn’t freak them out enough, it then takes the liberty of transforming itself into an image of Ash Ketchum himself, before revealing its true identity. Hello! It’s pronounced ‘Zo-Row-Arc’!

A shapeshifter? Not quite. Zoroark is described as an ‘Illusionary’ Pokemon, so it might well be that Zoroark is only able to take on the appearance of a target, without necessarily adopting the full range of their abilities. It’s hard to say how this power will translate into the new DS games, which are scheduled for release in Japan in late 2010. With Ditto already holding the copyright as the resident shapeshifting ’Mon, they’re going to need to conjure up something a bit special to ensure Zoroark forms his own identity. The fact that he’s getting his own film suggests that they’ve already come up with the goods.

And we can only wonder about his breeding habits – have we got another all-purpose, all-canoodling Ditto type on our hands? It would be fun to match one up with a Magikarp, and then have him transform into a Sharpedo mid-date, just for a laugh, like. Hey, if you had a stomach the width of a toilet roll and a hairdo that looked like the contents of Mick Hucknall’s bath plug, you’d use your illusionary powers before signing up on match.com, right?

One question that’s been flying around the Pokemon forums is this: is Zoroark a Legendary ’Mon? They don’t just give out movie subtitles to any old Tom, Dick and Flaaffy, after all. If it turns out that it is, then this represents a first for the series – no Legendary has ever had an evolved form before. But then Zoroark isn’t just another Pokemon – it’s a fifth-generation Pokemon. And at this stage, almost anything is possible.

Apr 24, 2010

Topics

Pokemon

15 comments

  • slimjim441 - May 5, 2010 5:49 a.m.

    Really Skykid? I've been seeing your comments around GR lately, and to be honest, you really have no idea what you are talking about most of the time. You should probably stop sucking your own dick with your head up your ass (I don't know how you mange that either) and leave your silly comments on the articles for the silly games you and people like you can drool over. reCAPTCHA: its rappe (so close)
  • awesomedudes - April 26, 2010 4:24 p.m.

    listen skykid if you don't like the games don't play them and don't cry that nobody likes you cuz crying is probably why everyone hates you so just STOP
  • bugcatcherjason - April 25, 2010 9:57 p.m.

    That scared the shit out of me.
  • Skykid - April 25, 2010 9:44 p.m.

    I was right, this is as stupid as all get out. Wow,I was actually right...?(laughing evily) MWAH-HAHAHAHAHA }-]
  • Skykid - April 25, 2010 9:37 p.m.

    To all fanboys! Pokemon is for people who have absolutely no lives WHATSOEVER! To add to that, the series is as old as Clinton's sex affairs; same decade, same amount of stupidity. :-D
  • xSTARMANx - April 25, 2010 8 p.m.

    yup old news....
  • GameManiac - April 25, 2010 3:33 a.m.

    I swear 5th gen will change Pokemon. Whether it's for the better or for worst, I don't care. I can't take this website seriously with Pokemon info, since ausomedudes already stated that this Pokemon info came out TWO FUCKING MONTHS AGO. And the fact that this article seemed rushed with the odd descriptions doesn't veil the facade that I can see through. That's the ONLY flaw of this website that I care enough to notice.
  • El_Hombre11 - April 24, 2010 8:48 p.m.

    LOL @ the ending of the clip hahaha
  • Hydrohs - April 24, 2010 7:24 p.m.

    Yeah this is awful old O_o Especially in internetz time.
  • AdolfHipster - April 24, 2010 4:57 p.m.

    another generation of pokemon pulled out of an asians ass. sigh*
  • awesomedudes - April 24, 2010 4:28 p.m.

    http://www.serebii.net/archive/February-2010.shtml February thats how long it took you SLOWPOKE
  • Cyberninja - April 24, 2010 12:39 p.m.

    something tells me this wont be a legadary just like lucario and it would be nice to have a third and fourth pokemon being able to use transform other than mew and ditto
  • BluePikmin - April 24, 2010 12:38 p.m.

    Its probably not legendary, like Lucario in his movie
  • JoeMasturbaby - April 24, 2010 12:25 p.m.

    dark pokemon suck imo.
  • Xplosive59 - April 24, 2010 12:10 p.m.

    really 13 movies? i stopped caring after pokemon 2000

Showing 1-15 of 15 comments

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