Unlike fellow titles like Shrek Super Slam, Smash n’ Crash Racing is depressingly devoid of any of the movie series’ charm. There are fewer jokes than a funeral and the voice acting consists of the same lines (“I’ve seen toenails tougher than you!”), repeated over and over, until your teeth are ground down. Even gathering your buddies and trying the multiplayer modes can’t muster a giggle – the Mario Kart -esque battle mode falls flat because ranged items automatically lock on, stripping the scraps of any strategy.
So GameCube should’ve been buried with Twilight Princess, and we’d all have remembered it with an affectionate tear in the eye. Instead, it goes with this, and the anguished wailing you get when you stub your toe.