E3 2011: The silliest gesticulations from the Microsoft Press Conference

The human body put to stupid and goofy Xbox use

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With rumors running hot that Nintendo%26rsquo;s new console will utilize a more traditional controller, we assumed Microsoft would play down some of the sillier aspects of Kinectivity. Quite the opposite! TheXbox press conferencerelentlessly bombarded gamers with Kinect enabled features throughout.


Above: Use the air, like you just don't care

And while the press conference kicked off with some interesting voice-controlled implementations, such as controlling Xbox TVand deploying squads inMass Effect 3, it eventually unspooled many laughably out-dated aspects of motion controlled wackiness that we%26rsquo;d just assumed the world had moved past. Rather than pretend it never happened, we decided to highlight thedepths playerscan sink to whentheir body becomes the controller.


Above: FREEZE! Hands in the air, maggots%26hellip; It%26rsquo;s time for Disneyland Adventures!


Above: Before loading certain Kinect games,players will be required to salute Bill Gates


Above: While enjoying Fable: The Journey, please feel free to perfect your fly fishing cast "She's a beauty!"


Above: Perform any endzone dance you like,just mindyour internalDignity Meter


Above: Ghost Recon: Future Soldier weapon customization, or pantomiming every Creed video?


Above: In Kinect Star Wars, you'll perform a force push... wait, this is how you fire in Ghost Recon?!


Above: Ah, here's Star Wars. Which apparently features motion-sensored Girl punches


Above: If you were wondering what the Kinect version of Wii wagglewould be, look no further


Above: Tae Bo made a huge comeback in Dance Central 2


Above: "No, youda Werewolf!"


Above: This is Kinect, kids. You best leave that kinda shit on the Wii Balance Board


Above: You are not worthy to look uponXbox TV! LOOK AWAY, FEMALE!


Above: Kinect Sports: Season 2 featured seasoned dochebags performing as jock stereotypes that made even nerds wince


Above: Levels inSesame Street: Once Upon a Monsterwill conclude with an 80%26rsquo;s high-five freeze frame


BONUS READER SUBMISSION: ThanksSam


Above: Submitted byJJ_UYvia Reddit

Jun 6, 2011

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