Sept 19 2007
Halo 3 is easily 360's biggest launch this year, but it seems Microsoft isn't about to whore out its leading series for just any range of branded tat. But while we're on board with ditching the plainly idiotic idea of Halo-themed lotto tickets, we're slightly let down to hear that Microsoft won't be taking up the opportunity to release Cortana-branded lingerie.
After all, if Bungie's Halo 3 is the Star Wars for 'generation Xbox', then surely Cortana's flourescent form is the new millenium's Princess Leia in the gold bikini? And which hot blooded male wouldn't raise an appreciative eyebrow if their loved one dressed up like Leia, or her modern equivalent? And, yes, we probably have thought about this too much...
Anyway. Microsoft's decisions aren't confined to axing holographic brassieres. Master Chief pyjamas and Covenant cups are out, but McFarlane models, Actionclix miniatures and laser-tag blasters are in.
"It's a balancing effort to be very, very careful that we don't over saturate and piss off our 15 million fans," Bungie's franchise bigwig Brain Jarrard told Reuters (opens in new tab)recently. "We are obviously looking to broaden 'Halo' and make it accessible ... while at the same time, we want to keep feeding our core audience."
Come on, Brian. We're certain any Halo fan lucky enough to see a lady taking off her clothes would go bananas if said strumpet was clad in Cortana-esque skimpies. What? We've got to stop thinking about this stuff now? Jees...