Creepshow III (2006)
The Horror: Both Stephen King and George Romero are out, but the series continues to limp on with five more bloodless horror shorts starring nobody you’ve ever heard of…
Why So Terrible? The horror’s been replaced with jokes this time around, and pretty much the entire film is – disarmingly – set during the daytime. Sort of like a really bad soap opera with added guts.
King Kong Lives (1986)
The Horror: Linda Hamilton, what were you thinking?! King Kong lies in a coma for a decade after falling from the Twin Towers (and surviving). As he waits for a life-saving heart transplant, a giant female ape is found in the jungle…
Why So Terrible? You’ve read the plot synopsis right? How that storyline ever got out of a board room is beyond us.
The Stepfather 3: Father's Day (1992)
The Horror: Uh-oh. Crazy stepfather Keith Grant (Robert Wightman) has escaped from his mental asylum, and has had plastic surgery to change his face. Now he could be anyone…
Why So Terrible? Stepfather 3’s tagline is “Daddy's been working in the garden... again!” We know we're terrified...
Boogeyman II (1983)
The Horror: Six months after the events of the first Boogeyman (God forbid), Lacey (Suzanna Love) visits some friends where she attempts to get over the events of the first Boogeyman (God forbid)…
Why So Terrible? Predictable, cheesy, boring. All the best bad buzz words apply here. Not only that, but the first 25 minutes of the film are pretty much made up of clips from the first Boogey…Talk about cheating.
Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987)
The Horror: Mental patient Ricky decides to avenge his brother’s death, and hacks his way through various body parts until he confronts his sibling’s killer – Mother Superior.
Wh y So Terrible? True, it has a ‘death by umbrella’ sequence that gets a few giggles, but SNDL2 is still a ropy, badly-acted shambles that relies on extended flashbacks to the first film to beef up its running time.
Exorcist II: The Heretic (1977)
The Horror: A priest investigates the death of Regan MacNeil’s exorcist, while Regan herself begins to suspect that there’s still a demon lurking somewhere inside her.
Why So Terrible? Have you seen the hypnotism scene? So hilariously bad it actually ends up funny. Which is not what an Exorcist movie should be. Ever.
The Amityville Curse (1990)
The Horror: The original haunted Amityville house welcomes five new residents, who spend a night there and are beset by ghosts and venomous insects.
Why So Terrible? It attempts to build up an intriguing mystery. It fails. It attempts to create a portentous mood. It fails. It attempts to skip over its gaping plot holes. It fails. Conclusion? FAIL.
Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000)
The Horror: A bunch of college students head into the same woods that Josh, Mike and Heather disappeared in, intent on finding out what happened to them.
Why So Terrible? Talk about an unnecessary sequel. Not only was nobody asking for this, when it arrived it was about as scary as a newborn kitten. So bad that the proposed third Blair Witch film (by the original’s directors) was swiftly cancelled.
The Birds II: Land's End (1994)
The Horror: “Birds go berserk and turn against mankind” reads the official plot synopsis. Yes, dear readers, we’re officially in rehash territory.
Why So Terrible? With an IMDb rating of just 2.7, it’s clear there’s little love for director Rick Rosenthal’s misguided follow-up (this is the director’s second appearance on this list, what with Halloween: Resurrection). His film’s direst offence? It’s mind-numbingly boring.
Omen IV: The Awakening (1991)
The Horror: Hooray, evil old Damien’s dead! But oh, there’s another child with scary eyes and a penchant for being around when weird accidents happen. Could young Karen be an even more evil youngling than Damo?
Why So Terrible? Uh, no, of course not. This direct-to-DVD misfire works simply as a string of set-pieces with no discernible plot.
