February 2003
Regular feature:
Trash Compactor
Where bullshit runs scared
#1 Kate Bush Writes Doctor Who
THE MYTH: This seductive urban myth finds pop witch Kate Bush penning the Doctor Who story “Kinda” in 1982. The evidence? The tale was credited to an elusive bod named “Christopher Bailey” – who shares his initials with… Catherine Bush! Snatches of dialogue are said to be buried in the mix of Bush’s ’85 masterwork Hounds Of Love , while her video for “The Dreaming” recycles a Cyberman costume to strangely erotic effect. The spooksome warbler is rumoured to be a secret Who junkie – in 1989 The Guardian claimed that her new album would be titled An Unearthly Child , the name of the Time Lord’s first TV caper – while “Kinda” itself is deeply weird, oddly profound and quite beautiful. Just like… Kate Bush. Hmm. Compelling.
THE TRUTH: Pure tosh, with a side-serving of baloney. This myth was concocted by a cabal of Who fans as a fiendish piece of “art terrorism” – or possibly just a good, old fashioned leg-pull – and enthusiastically spread by – ahem – a former SFX columnist. And we all know that the real author of “Kinda” was Tom Stoppard.
