Pen To Paper: Paltrow, Pacino & Myers! Not starring in the same film!

Jake Paltrow’s recently been making a little buzz directing for TV, helming episodes of The Jury and The Others. But now he’s scribbled a movie script – and he’s asked his big sister Gwyneth to star in it. (Well, you would too. Wouldn’t you?)

Jake’s script, The Good Night, is the story of an Englishman seeking perfection in all areas of life. Fresh off The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy, Martin Freeman has also signed on to play a washed-up musician who is reduced to jotting down ad jingles for a living. Also joining Jake’s directorial debut is none other than Shaun Of The Dead zombie-killer Simon Pegg.

Alicia Witt (Vanilla Sky), Leelee Sobieski (Eyes Wide Shut) and Neal McDonough (Minority Report) have all signed on the dotted line to appear alongside Al Pacino in crime drama 88 Minutes. Jon Avnet, who directed Total Film’s favourite Chinese courtroom drama starring Richard Gere, Red Corner, has a tendency to go gooey, but the premise sounds top notch. Pacino is a college professor and FBI psychologist who’s convinced that McDonough’s Death Row inmate is orchestrating a crime that will take place in the NEXT 88 MINUTES! Sobieski is one of Pacino’s students and Witt will play his lady love.

Mike Myers was caught by surprise recently when asked about a possible return to the shagadelic Austin Powers series. “There is hope!” the mop-topped Canadian commented. “We're all talking to each other and I miss doing the characters.”

Question is, what depths of bad taste are left for him to plumb? Answers on a postcard (or the forum) please…