10 things we ABSOLUTELY know about the Xbox One

We actually know plenty of stuff

We've spent the last few days discussing the newly-announced Xbox One, Microsoft's entry into the next-generation of consoles. And while we still have plenty of questions about stuff, like whether or not it's going to require an internet connection or destroy used games, there are things we've been able to figure out about the system.

In fact, there's a lot we do know! Here's a list of all of the 10 most important things we know about the next-generation of Microsoft hardware.

It isn't powered by hamsters running on wheels. It has a traditional power supply.

It comes with an advanced version of Kinect that is required to be connected at all times, even when you're naked on your couch eating another pizza.

It doesn't double as a room humidifier OR a dehumidifier.

It isn't not NOT not always NOT online (but it does require online to function).

Steven Spielberg thinks it's really cool, and his kids probably think it's cool that he thinks it's cool.

The new analog sticks are, in fact, not made out of snakeskin, no matter how much they look like they are.

The edges aren't sharp enough to cut glass (but can probably cut human skin, so please be careful).

It will allow you to finally watch that Dark Knight Blu-ray you got for Christmas in 2009.

At some point in the future, you'll be able to purchase one for cash, credit, or--at some retailers--a check.

People will camp out for several days prior to its launch only to smash one in front of eager early adopters with a sledgehammer in order to get more YouTube subscribers.

What else could we need to know?

Seriously, isn't that enough for you people? There's plenty of information out there, and yet you keep focusing on "potential scenarios" instead of enjoying the fact that you'll finally get to see why everyone liked that Batman movie so much. What other things do you know about the system? Let us know in the comments.

And if you're looking for more, check out an editorial on what Microsoft's media focus means for games and 6 ways Microsoft can win us back at E3.