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Want to have sex? Play this video game first

What do you get if you cross horny young teenagers, mo-cap suits and almost half a million US dollars in taxpayers' money? An abomination, that's what. In a bid to save schoolkids' virginities by reaching them through a medium they understand, a well-meaning but terminally misguided group at the University of Central Florida has created a videogame about sexual abstinence. And it's awful.

The fundamental flaw with the 'game' is that these graphics would have looked duff in a 1994 CG video, let alone a modern videogame. So there's no way middle-schoolers today will be able to relate to it. And the less said about the head-tracking the better. It's quite surprising, really, that they chose to recreate a scene from The Exorcist to show off the thing to Fox News (1:03), but hey - we haven't been funded half a million dollars to make a game, so what do we know? Check it out: 



According to UCF professor Anne Norris, it's "a place to practice where there aren't any social consequences." Can you imagine the carnage if the thing is ever left unattended? And we suspect it will just put ideas in kids' heads. When you give hormone-addled young minds this image of beauty to lust after, you're just asking for trouble.


Above: Notice how everyone in this girl's presence is being physically sick. Yeah, she gets that a lot

29 Jul, 2010

Topics

Sexy sexy WTF

52 comments

  • AznNguyen72 - August 5, 2010 8:02 a.m.

    This is horrifying why can't they just use the Sims 3 to make the simulation?
  • axelgarcia1 - August 1, 2010 2:58 a.m.

    videogames are supposed to be fun. only way an educational game caN succeed in teaching is if its fun... "YAY LETS LEARN ABOUT ABSTENENCE!" how many kids do u hear say that when they try out a game
  • M0rt1f1cat0r - July 31, 2010 8:06 p.m.

    434,000 for that? my seven year old brother could make something better for $5 and some reeses pieces.
  • AlphaWolf428 - July 31, 2010 6:39 a.m.

    ... okay, ignore the fact that the game is using federal tax dollars, ignore the fact that fox is doing a story on it, and ignore the fact that its being made by your grandparents... thy have a half a million dollar budget and this is what they've got?
  • YuGiOhisbetterthanMagic - July 31, 2010 1:36 a.m.

    wow, ya know, its people like these that make me drink and then cry myself to sleep.
  • Urza4315 - July 30, 2010 5:17 a.m.

    People starving around the world and the taxpayer's money goes towards telling Brad and Jennifer not to have sex. Wonderful.
  • Trondz - July 30, 2010 12:47 a.m.

    I'm seriously waiting for those designers of that "thing" to post a trollface picture or something...
  • FartJokes - July 29, 2010 8:11 p.m.

    I always thought if you advertised something like sex as 'bad' or 'evil' kids would want to do it more? Alcohol is considered bad for kids but kids think it's the coolest thing hense underage drinking problems. Surely this will just fuel fantasies in a teenagers head if tey're told they're not allowed to do it.
  • jakery22 - July 29, 2010 7:44 p.m.

    haha, "It sounds complicated but it's really simple technology" Yeah, you can tell with the graphics.
  • nuno004 - July 29, 2010 7:13 p.m.

    This game is a half million dollar piece of crap or My name isn't Axel Cabrera reCAPTCHA:hschriften, economics. florida, consider your economy hschriften
  • scsmith1 - July 29, 2010 7:09 p.m.

    I like how the news anchor made her annoyance of the tax dollars spent in the way she said the total.
  • ViewtifulBrandon - July 29, 2010 7:07 p.m.

    So if you have sex do you lose points?
  • JoeMasturbaby - July 29, 2010 7:05 p.m.

    its a sex simulator! also that lady thinks playing games gets you action?
  • H311DUCk - July 29, 2010 6:58 p.m.

    /facepalm
  • Vitoruss1 - July 29, 2010 6:43 p.m.

    WHAT IS THIS I DONT EVEN I don't understand it anymore. Why are people spending all of this money on a shitty way to try to convince teenagers not to have sex? You bait them into decisions with valueless points? Teenagers are going to be teenagers! This won't affect their decisions at all! I'm turning 17 in two months. That makes me the prime demographic for this atrocious machine. I don't understand why these people waste their time trying to change nature. There's a *reason* why people become horny in their teenage years, but these conservatives are wasting our federal tax dollars on a stupid idealistic fantasy. It's disgusting.
  • Harmonator - July 29, 2010 6:07 p.m.

    I have lost all reason to be proud to be an american.
  • MrDuracraft - July 29, 2010 6:06 p.m.

    Points... I really don't know how it is humanly possible not one of the people working on it knew that nobody gives a flying f*** about points anymore. Now, achievements. Achievements would work. "You have successfully exorcised this horny teenager! 50p!"
  • Grimi - July 29, 2010 6 p.m.

    It looks like all the characters are having seizures.
  • Silentboy - July 29, 2010 5:58 p.m.

    Still better than most 3rd party games on the Wii. ZING!
  • JPorFavor - July 29, 2010 5:52 p.m.

    If that's motion capture, then can I spin my head 180 degrees too? And of course I'm gonna play this, I love them points.

Showing 1-20 of 52 comments

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