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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time Re-Shelled review

Zeroes in a half-shell

Pros

  • Full of nostalgia
  • Lots of beating-up
  • Just like you remember - almost

Cons

  • Utterly shallow
  • New graphics are kinda worse
  • Combat feels vaporous and indistinct

The first Turtles game hit Live back in 2007 and became one of the biggest sellers on the Marketplace. It was, of course, rubbish. Ubisoft are gambling on the same nostalgia-fuelled sales for their 3D remake of its sequel, Turtles in Time. Which is, of course, also rubbish. Even the critics of the day were guarded in their praise for the Turtles games. Turtles in Time was half-shelled mediocrity back in 1991 and no polygonal makeover can disguise a game near-identical to the original %26ndash; a straight trek through hordes of identical chumps, hacked through with a single button press.

In the remake, those chumps are 3D, but the new lick of paint has made every strike even more vaporous and indistinct. It%26rsquo;s an 18-year-old 2D game dragged into the 3D space whether it likes it or not, and it doesn%26rsquo;t like it one bit. In a bracket it shares with Final Fight, Streets of Rage, and the old Simpsons coin-op, Turtles in Time is distinguished by its utter mindlessness and resistance to any kind of strategy; a game of will over skill.

Aug 10, 2009

More Info

GenreArcade
Description<p>This may be a&#160;classic arcade brawler that's come to XBLA, but the title's&#160;vapid repetitiveness should have been left in the past.</p>
PlatformXbox 360, PS3
US censor ratingEveryone 10+, Everyone 10+
UK censor rating12+, 12+
Alternative namesTMNT: Turtles in Time Re-Shelled
Release date:5 August 2009 (US), 5 August 2009 (UK)
Available platforms:Xbox 360
Genre:Arcade
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