Nintendo unveils another silly peripheral to improve the 3DS in case you didn't like the last silly peripheral

Because who needs to hold a handheld in their actual hands?

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First, we had the 3DS. It was very much based on the DS, because the DS had worked and did pretty much everything it was supposed to do. The 3DS had a d-pad, an analogue stick, and a versatile touchscreen to handle camera control and anything else it might ever need to. And then Nintendo panicked and decided that the touchscreen was crap, and made a second plug-in analogue stick. Oh how we laughed.

And now it seems to have panicked again, and decided that the plug-in stick is actually the thing that is crap, and made a special stand to stick your 3DS on in case you do want to use the touch-screen after all.

Christ Nintendo, stop being so f*cking apologetically needy of our approval. The way you're behaving like you've just punched my gran in the boob, not bestowed upon me a basically excellent handheld fun-machine.

But whatever Nintendo's insecurities, this is the thing:


Above: Rhyme unintentional. But you're right, it would make an amazing advertising slogan for this thing

It's designed so that you can more comfortably use the analogue stick and the touch-screen at the same time during Kid Icarus: Uprising's on-foot sections. It's alright, I suppose, but the elevated sitting position for the console makes it look potentially a bit unstable. And the idea of a 3D portable Nintendo console requiring a stand for comfortable use of course summons up uncomfortable memories of the Virtual Boy, like some eldritch seething netherdemon rising from the very stinking bowels of beyond.

Also, can you imagine using the Circle Pad Pro and this stand together? Heed this warning from history Nintendo. It's a slippery slope you're on.

Still, I suppose it's great for all of those poor unfortunates who really want to enjoy the 3DS but can't due to their incredibly weak wrists.

Zombies then, basically. And babies.

Babies are rubbish at stuff.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Long-time GR+ writer Dave has been gaming with immense dedication ever since he failed dismally at some '80s arcade racer on a childhood day at the seaside (due to being too small to reach the controls without help). These days he's an enigmatic blend of beard-stroking narrative discussion and hard-hitting Psycho Crushers.
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