Game-inspired sexual positions

Even our libidos are nerdy


Above: A more considerate version of the alternate “BOOM! HEADSHOT!”


Above: A little ball of joy


Above: This particular position is 100 times hotter if she gets the Castlevania reference


Above: A very challenging maneuver (Press Z or R twice!)


Above: A titillating way to get her in the mood


Above: The slow and calculated descent is sure to excite…just be sure not to shoot the “invader” prematurely


Above: Not a sexual position as much as a strategy, but important nonetheless

So, to answer your question, this is how ridiculous we are. What. And yet we continue, because once we start brainstorming we can’t stop. Here are a few of the ideas we couldn’t illustrate, so you’ll just have to use your imagination. But imagination is what it’s all about… we just hope your partner welcomes your bolstered creative drive… shaft.

Gold Farming
The Red Ring
Entering the Matrix
The Dirty Ramirez
Blast Processing
Hammer of Dawn
The Two Fisted Waggle
Grinding for Experience
The Preemptive Strike
The Sticky Grenade
Eating the Cherry
SEXAXIS
The Zerg Rush
The Mega Drive
The BioSlap
The Splicer
Use the Boost to Get Through
Dual-Wielding
Inverted Aim
The Will Wright Angle

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Associate Editor, Digital at PC Gamer

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