30 Disturbing Movie Cakes
Fancy tucking in to any of these?

Freddy Krueger
The Cake: A likeness (or unlikeness) of dream-lurking serial killer Freddy. The head was apparently sculpted by covering Rice Krispies with fondant. All the other bits (hat, worms, spider) were off the shelf.
Disturbing How? Do you really fancy eating what looks like a marzipan burn victim? That said, those people who were particularly upset by what Freddy got up to in his movies should take pleasure from carving him up good and proper.

Gizmo
The Cake: Cuddling little critter Gizmo – him off the Gremlins movies – gets immortalised in pastry and frosting.
Disturbing How? The likeness is just good enough to ensure we recognise the little fella, but just wrong enough to have us reaching for the door handle. Also, how could we eat such a cute wee chap?

Robert Pattison
The Cake: A still from Twilight: New Moon is lovingly welded onto the face of a birthday cake. For Christina.
Disturbing How? It was bad enough suffering through old pasty R-Patz’s strip scene in the movie, let alone having it haunt us on the top of a cake. Also, we don’t like the thought of screaming girls arguing over who gets the bit of cake with the abs on…

High School Musical
The Cake: A flamboyant pink abomination, all stars and frosting. Crafted for some lady called Haylene, who we assume isn't a sad middle-aged woman, but a Disney-mad tween with a massive crush on Zac Efron. He’s so dreamy…
Disturbing How? It’s pink! And hideous! And wrapped up in some very scary capitalist issues about the marketing of perfect young teens to the anxiety-ridden youth of today...

Sugar Kane
The Cake: Poor old John Hurt’s chest gets burst out of again – this time with a load of red-gooey marzipan. His identity’s also been wiped, his name tag replaced with the name ‘Rex’. We’re guessing that’s the birthday boy.
Disturbing How? It’s the most disturbing moment in the film, rendered in the spongey flesh. For eating pleasure. What’s not disturbing about that?

Its A Girl!
The Cake: A very odd creation that has Darth Vader helping a happy couple (we assume) to celebrate the birth of their lovely daughter.
Disturbing How? It’s sinister as hell. Vader isn’t exactly the nicest chap in the universe, and this looks suspiciously like a cradle-robbing attempt. Time for the recipient of this cake to get new friends.

Back To The Future
The Cake: A stunning recreation of the pivotal square from Back To The Future . The only thing that’s missing is Doc hanging from the clock – though they got the detail with the lightning-catching wire.
Disturbing How? The main disturbing thing about this is how meticulously it has recreated the real deal. There's nowt more queer than fanboydom.

Carrie
The Cake: Carrie White in her crowning moment, soaked in pig’s blood and with a determined look of doom in her eyes. We’re assuming that’s not real pig’s blood.
Disturbing How? It may be Carrie’s crowning moment, but it’s also her most devastating. Also, we can’t help wondering whose poor Barbie got butchered for this one.

Hogwarts Castle
The Cake: These people really should be architects. Somehow a master-baker has managed to completely recreate Hogwarts Castle, replete with spires and windows – even the clock and the moat below it. Stellar stuff.
Disturbing How? So real that we could imagine Harry gurning out front, it entirely warps our grip on reality.

Johnny Depp
The Cake: A frankly bizarre ode to the beauty of Johnny Depp, with miniature models based on the actor laid bare atop a cake, wearing nothing but leopard skin pants. Additional photos present to help confirm identity, just in case.
Disturbing How? ‘If you can’t get the man himself, make a cake of him instead,’ screams this baking horror. We wonder who got to bite his head off.

Indiana Jones
The Cake: That iconic scene from the start of Raiders Of The Lost Ark , where Indy breaks into an ancient Peruvian temple to grab an artefact.
Disturbing How? The hollow eyes and screaming mouth of the statue are an image of prostrate, desperate hell. No wonder – two giant hands are about to pinch him.

Kraken
The Cake: We're not 100% sure if this is meant to be the giant kraken creature from the Pirates Of The Caribbean movies, but it’s damn near close enough.
Disturbing How? Squids are horrible, end of. Loads of tentacles, horrible sucker things, and a mean twinkle in their eye. We don’t like them one bit, especially in cake form.

Mad Hatter
The Cake: More Depp immortalisation, as his character from Alice In Wonderland gets a marzipan makeover.
Disturbing How? The look on the Mad Hatter’s face is, well, mental. And not a little bit scary, like he's wondering how he's going to cook you for dinner. And what garnish to use. We’ll be having nightmares tonight, that’s for sure.
Josh Winning has worn a lot of hats over the years. Contributing Editor at Total Film, writer for SFX, and senior film writer at the Radio Times. Josh has also penned a novel about mysteries and monsters, is the co-host of a movie podcast, and has a library of pretty phenomenal stories from visiting some of the biggest TV and film sets in the world. He would also like you to know that he "lives for cat videos..." Don't we all, Josh. Don't we all.



















