Top ten most breathtaking moments in God of War II

5) Have sex as a fish
Finish the game and you get the chance to play as Kratos in his special "Cod of War" fish suit. Then leap out of the swimming pool where you end up during the Colossus fight and you find these two young ladies behind a screen. A quick reaction-test later and the moans are flying, although all you get to see is a nearby statue of cupid getting "excited."

6) Massive sea beast battle
When he goes up against raging sea creature, the Kraken, Kratos takes a bit of inspiration from Shadow of the Colossus and climbs up its tentacles before hacking them off with the Blades of Chaos. The poor monster tries to hang on to the columns nearby, but our hero's having none of it: he simply triggers the bridge to nearby Phoenix Island, making seafood soup of the octopus's head.

7) Spearing a man in the guts
The Horse Keeper's the most annoying character in the game: a big, bearded, swaggering chump who bellows with laughter and gets minotaurs to do all his dirty work. But he's got a key that Kratos really, really needs. So when old stripe-face finally knocks him off his rooftop hiding place, it's time for a gentle etiquette lesson - i.e. impaling him on his own spear and slamming his head in a door six hundred times.

Joel Snape
Joel Snape enjoys Street Fighter V, any sandbox game that contains a satisfyingly clacky shotgun and worrying about the rise of accidentally-malevolent super-AI. He's also the founder-editor of, where he talks a lot about working out.