"Tell me this doesn’t look like a fantasy porno" – The internet goes full internet while reacting to the Witcher Netflix series first look

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You’ve probably already seen the first look at Henry Cavill as Geralt of Rivia for The Witcher Netflix series and have had some opinions on it. Well, so has the rest of the internet. But, hey, they’re not all cynical and overwhelmingly Negative Nancies. No, some are actually pleased the shot of the cleft-chinned Cavill has stuck remarkably close to its literary roots and… ha, who am I kidding – you’re here for the withering put downs, right?

Pound shop Legolas

Hey, did you know Henry Cavill’s Geralt also looks like a certain Lord of the Rings character? What’s that, you’ve already seen the joke made a billion times on your Twitter timeline? Sorry, can’t hear you. La-la-la-la. Here’s more people dunking on poor old Hank, LOTR-style.

It looks like... WHAT?

Bow chicka wow-wow. I’m not sure I want to delve into the search history of some of those reacting but, sure, whatever floats your boat.

But what about the books?

Look, it’s true. The gruff Geralt of Witcher 3 was only part of how the character looks. In the books, as people are all too keen to point out, Geralt actually bears a bit of a resemblance to Henry Cavill’s portrayal of the character. But who has time for reading nowadays? I’ve not even re-read this. Don’t tell my editor.

Beard to the bone

What is with Henry Cavill and facial hair? If he’s not getting facial fuzz digitally removed in Justice League, he’s got people clamouring for a bit of white stubble in the Witcher Netflix series. The man can’t win. Pro tip, Henry: the party shop does a great stick-on beard for a fiver.

Just remember: It's a first look

Yep, a classy photo might’ve been better suited to doing the trick, but the production hasn’t even started filming yet! Just hold your Roaches and pass judgment on the final product when it comes out. And ignore the snark above. Especially mine.

Header image credit: @LionFace on Twitter  

Will the Witcher series join the pantheon of the best shows on Netflix? Here's hoping!