The fact that Xbox even made a trailer celebrating the closure of its Activision Blizzard acquisition, like it's the last big hitter of an E3 showcase, is bizarre enough, if unsurprising. But the sheer, goggle-eyed, 'Let's hear it for capitalism' chest-beating of the thing is, well, I wish I could say otherworldly, but absolutely strange to say the least.
Just to drive home the Alice in Capitalism vibes, the two-minute trailer – 114 honest-to-god seconds – is set to verses from 'Oh, What a Beautiful Mornin' from the 1943 musical Oklahoma. "There's a bright golden haze on the meadow," the trailer begins, but instead of Curly McLain eyeing Laurey Williams across a field, it's Xbox welcoming distraught, hapless, down-on-their-luck, capital-G Gamers into the ostensibly glorious tomorrow where Microsoft owns the entire world.
I'll give Microsoft one thing: The absurd juxtaposition of IP here does illustrate the enormity of this deal, though its impact can't hope to match the psychic damage dealt by the World of Warcraft clips in this trailer. First of all, yes, World of Warcraft is in an Xbox sizzle reel. Welcome to the golden meadow. Second of all, I don't think this is the context Blizzard's writers had in mind when they had that orc lad ask, "So this is home now?"
"Home. Family," replies Orc Number 2 – yes, I know it's Varok and Thrall, I just like to mess with World of Warcraft players – presumably seconds away from donning his newly provided Xbox blazer.
It's not just Activision games, either. Xbox is very proud of all the IP it's acquired through buyouts, so Activision games, from distant relatives like Sekiro to mainstays like Call of Duty, are rubbing elbows with Bethesda properties like Fallout and Starfield. To put things into perspective, here's a list of the games shown in this trailer – which doesn't even cover all the IP Xbox just bought – that are all under the Xbox umbrella:
- World of Warcraft
- Halo
- Call of Duty
- Forza
- Sea of Thieves
- Diablo
- Overwatch
- Fallout
- Starfield
- Psychonauts
- Crash Bandicoot
- Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice (which, as a reminder, Activision published)
- Candy Crush (that's the quietly enormous King portion of Activision Blizzard King coming into play)
- Starcraft
- Prototype (Prototype!? And the first one?! Who remembers that?)
- Hellblade
- Doom
- Spyro
- Minecraft
- The Elder Scrolls
- Fable
- Hi-Fi Rush
- Gears of War
- Tony Hawk's Pro Skater
"The breeze is so busy it don't miss a tree," indeed. Is Xbox teasing new installments in any of these long-running and often long-dormant franchises? Not right now it isn't, but it clearly wants folks to remember they exist and who owns them.
Phil Spencer extends olive branch to PS5 players as Xbox Activision Blizzard deal closes: "You are welcome here - and will remain welcome."
