1 Barnacles
Suggested movie title: Stuck On You
A cute, plucky young barnacle decides to strike out and see the world… and travels about 3cm by the end of the movie
2 Pubic lice
Suggested movie title: Bush Babies
A cute, plucky young pubic louse goes off in search of the mystical Eve’s Volcano
3 Dung beetles
Suggested movie title: On A Roll
A cute, plucky young dung beetle decides his life is shit
4 Tape worms
Suggested movie title: Inside Story
A cute plucky young tape worm needs to unwind
5 Slugs*
Suggested movie title: Slime Time
A cute, plucky young slug takes on the almighty Salt Corporation to disastrous effects
* Yeah, we know the Aardman film Flushed Away featured slugs, but that flopped and we reckon slugs were one of the reasons why…
6 Maggots
Suggested movie title: One Day I’ll Fly Away
A cute, plucky young maggot has to avoid ending up as fish bait
7 Candiru (those Amazonian fish that swim up your wee into your manhood)
Suggested movie title: Going For The Tackle
A cute, plucky young candiru learns the facts of life and thinks his parents are taking the piss
8 Krill
Suggested movie title: A View To A Krill
A cute, plucky young krill tries to swim against the flow
9 Naked Mole Rat
Suggested movie title: Naked Mole Ratatouille
A cute… er, scratch that… A not-quite-so-ugly-as-other-naked-mole-rats, plucky young naked mole rat tries to find a job a job as a stripper
10 Piers Morgan
Suggested movie title: The Editor Strikes Back
A horror movie. In every sense