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Live-action Jason Voorhees has reared his ugly masked head for the first time in 16 years, and it's all very strangely courtesy of a short film premiering on YouTube and sponsored by the hard cider company Angry Orchard.
When I received the press for release for this, uh, project, in my email, I genuinely couldn't believe what I was seeing. Friday the 13th franchise rights holder Horror, Inc. has teamed up with Angry Orchard to produce Sweet Revenge, a "short-form vignette" designed to be "the centerpiece of the franchise's bold 45th anniversary campaign."
I know, it isn't much, but holy crap, that's Jason effin' Voorhees, y'all. Live! In the rotting flesh! Sure, I would've loved to see him turned around, preferably with a machete buried into some poor college kid's dome, but I'll freakin' take it.
"I am so grateful that the team at Horror, Inc. saw something in Sweet Revenge and wanted it as a part of the Jason Voorhees story!" said Nelson in a statement. "And to think 30 years ago I was trying to secretly watch these movies on VHS when no one was looking.
"Not only is the vignette a new take on the beloved IP, it is a comforting, gory hug, reminding us why we fell in love with these movies. Much gruesome fun awaits you!"
Per Horror, Inc., "fans will drop into a chilling weekend in the woods filled with blood-soaked surprises only Jason can deliver."
Look, I'll take what I can get. I've rewatched every Friday the 13th movie, as well as the Never Hike Alone fan-made series, so much that I have most of the lines memorized, so I am not going to turn my nose up at a new movie, even if it is just a YouTube short movie sponsored by a gosh dang apple cider company.
"Fans have been hungry for more Jason stories, and as we celebrate 45 years of this icon, we wanted to deliver a taste of what’s to come," said Horror, Inc. executive vice president Robbie Barsamian. "Sweet Revenge brings Jason back to his brutal roots, where he belongs, with Mike’s delivery of expertly crafted thrills and kills."
For its part, Angry Orchard's Matt Withington said the hard cider company's "fans love bold, unexpected entertainment—especially horror—so this partnership just made sense.
"It's a perfect way to celebrate 45 years of an iconic franchise while creating new experiences for our drinkers in a space that they are already passionate about. We can't wait to continue to bring the partnership to life this year."
I do have to give props for having the boldness to say pairing up Angry Orchard and Friday the 13th "just made sense," but no, this doesn't make any sense at all. I'll watch the hell out of Sweet Revenge, but I will never concede that any of this makes sense outside the corrupted logic of a melatonin-induced fever dream.
It might not have made our list of the best horror movies ever made, but Friday the 13th holds a very special place in my heart.
