Is Star Wars ruining SoulCalibur?

Why not just a Star Wars fighting game?

And what we really mean is - why not create a game that isn’t insulting to the canon of two successful franchises? Even if SCIV is far from approaching the fan fapping of Mortal Kombat vs DC, this entry strangely feels like a stepping stone for a sequel to PS1’s ill-fated Masters of Teras Kasi.

Above: Didn’t work out the first time

Maybe the SW inclusion won’t have any adverse effects, but the more outside elements you add to a franchise, the more the series may become diluted in gimmick tomfoolery. Seriously, won’t you get pissed just a little if Chewie shows up as a secret character ready to razzle with Nightmare?

Above: Lumpy from the Star Wars Christmas Special enters the fight. Happy Life Day!

Unappealing underarmor

SCIV features a new Critical Finish system that enables you to shatter your opponent’s armor, which is great for breastfully-inclined eye candy like Cassandra and Taki. It’s not so great when you have a decrepit hand puppet or a scarred-to-shit white guy to disrobe at your leisure. You don’t even want to know what a saggy Yoda nipple looks like.

Above: What happens when you break away Vader’s armor, which is not as bad as…

Above: When you break away this Muppet’s armor

Jun 19, 2008