I'll never understand humanity's desperation to invent new forms of pain. As if our bodies' natural inclination toward heartburn and broken bones wasn't enough, we had to go out of our way to create bombs, nailguns, and, in one YouTuber's case, Five Nights at Freddy's laxative challenge runs.
"There's a ton of different speedrun categories," Wigglesworth says in his debut laxative video. "All are very cool, but I want to push the limits of the speedrunning world by introducing my own category dubbed laxative%, wherein you must consume a copious amount of laxatives."
"The one and only rule of the category," he continues, "is, if you explode, you lose."
But don't dwell on the laxative runs – or laxative runs, as it were – because there's more. Mr. Wigglesworth's YouTube channel is a vortex of suffering. He almost exclusively plays Five Nights at Freddy's: Security Breach, the 2021 survival horror spin-off about a child trapped in Freddy's Pizzaplex murder emporium with evil animatronics, like an alligator with a mohawk named Monty.
"There's so many Monties," Wigglesworth cries during a chaos modifier challenge run in which enemies can be randomized and he chose to, in addition, electrocute himself with a $244 shock collar for Saint Bernards every time he died.
While playing Security Breach – which I can further describe in no other way than it looks how beef jerky tastes – Wigglesworth has also attempted EggRoulette%, for which he crushed raw and boiled eggs into his mouth, GivingBirth%, where he was glued to a labor pain simulator, and ExplodingHead%, when he tried to find out how many rubber bands it would take to pop his head like bubblegum.
Through it all, Mr. Wigglesworth has become my unlikely, favorite speedrunner, a sadistic impulse I owe to my ranking both Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and Jackass as five-star cinema. Why do we subject ourselves to so much pain? Of course, it's to feel something, and to play Five Nights at Freddy's.
