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Saving Stuff For The Spin-Offs
Why We Don’t Want To See It: In the original trilogy, every major character had a good reason for being there.
If they had stuck half of the Clone Wars' set-pieces into the actual film, it would have been as good as the original trilogy.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: Make sure it's about Nien Nunb.
We'd be so happy we're getting a spin-off film following that guy, we'd take whatever we can get.
Recasting
Why We Don’t Want To See It: Should, say, Mark Hamill do a U-turn and decide not to reprise his role, then just write out Luke completely.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: Kenny Baker is 79, for goodness sake.
If he doesn't feel up to sitting in a tin box for months on end, let some other poor sod sit in R2-D2.
Gag Deaths
Why We Don’t Want To See It: After The Empire Strikes Back , kids everywhere decided that Boba Fett was the coolest space dude they'd ever seen.
Not so cool.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: C-3PO is just asking to be blown to bits for a laugh.
You know, as long as he's put back together again afterwards.
We love you Threepio.
Excessive Continuity
Why We Don’t Want To See It: One of the least remarked of the prequels' many sins is the insistence on trying to dot every 'i' from the original trilogy, from a spurious Jabba cameo to meeting baby Boba Fett.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: It's high time we met the Bothans properly.
They died to bring us this information, don't cha know.
Child Leads
Why We Don’t Want To See It: Yes, it's probably inevitable that Han and Leia will have kids.
Let's see 'em during their teenage angsty years, please.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: Anakin set the precedent for punishing Younglings in Episode 3 , so there's always the off-chance that they can wiped out if they get TOO annoying.
Bad dialogue
Why We Don’t Want To Hear It: Everybody rightly derides "Hold me like you did by the lake on Naboo," but it's not like the original trilogy didn't contain the odd clunker, like whiny Luke's "It's not that I like the Empire. I hate it! But there's nothing I can do about it right now. It's such a long way from here."
Expanded Universe Pedantry
Why We Don’t Want To See It: Ever visited the fans' bible, Wookieepedia? It's like a previously undiscovered circle of hell.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: Thrawn is pretty cool.
Dull Parents
Why We Don’t Want To See It: Too many of the novels neglected Luke and Han, turning them into boring middle-aged men who had settled into domestic bliss and 9-to-5 day jobs.
It'd barely be worth Hamill and Ford turning up if that proves to be the case in the film.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: It's a front.
Whatever they tell people they're doing, Han is still a rogue and Luke is busy lopping off limbs with a lightsaber.
Platform Game Action
Why We Don’t Want To See It: Attack Of The Clones lurched from set-piece to set-piece like a group of friends had wandered back from the pub to play on their Xbox.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: Give the characters a decent reason for having to fight their way from A to B, and a scary monster at the level's end.
Jar-Jar
Why We Don’t Want To See It: Do you really need to ask?
Won't that be, like, really awkward if they have to share a scene?
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: It's not Jar Jar but his great, great, great grandson, who happens to be the most bad-ass bounty hunter in the galaxy.
One ear missing, lightsaber scar across his face and – crucially – no accent.
Luke Turns To The Dark Side
Why We Don’t Want To See It: It's a plot twist that has long been a favourite of the Expanded Universe, but it's a very fannish idea, and one that risks making the original trilogy really depressing in retrospect.
Oh, Go On, If You Have To: Breaking bad is a bluff on Luke's part.
