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We love horror films.
But sometimes, we think there just aren't enough of them. So, with Halloween approaching, we've decided to celebrate the horror movie mash-up phenomenon, which turns ordinary films and TV shows into the gore flicks we love.
The best are below. You won't believe how good Mrs Doubtfire looks...
Home Alone
Best Bit In The Trailer: Quiet possibly the build-up. With that '80s low-budget horror music and the Carrie-esque storyline going on, it's a promising crescendo.
And the climax delivers. Just look at his face at 00.47.
We'll never look at Kevin McCallister in the same way again.
Best Scene If It Was A Film: It would only take a few minor alterations to turn Home Alone into a Saw -style terror flick.
You've got the psychotic killer, the graphic murder scenes, and above all, some damned creative denouements.
We'd like to see one long scene, a gross-out bloodbath, where a series of booby-traps are set off in the kitchen, triggering flying knives, cheese-wire and toastie-makers.
To be honest, if this was real life, we're sure that the falling iron would have smashed Marv's scull, and that Harry's brains would be all over the walls after that swinging paint-tin hit.
Oh well. We'll just have to stick to our sketching. Though we have run out of red felt-tip.
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House of 1000 Muppets
Best Bit In The Trailer: By using the soundtrack to House Of 1000 Corpses alongside mashed-up Muppets footage, the geniuses behind this re-cut have birthed a thing of grotesque beauty.
Our favourite bit: Big-Bird's brief cameo as the mysterious hitch-hiker. Ridiculously funny.
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: Doctor Satan (A.K.A. Dr. Teeth) has Miss Piggy bound and gagged and facing the wall.
When she won't stop crying, he gets angry.
Dr. Teeth: Listen you Malibu, middle-class, Barbie piece of sh**, I'm trying to work here! * Removes gag*
Miss Piggy: Where's Kermit? Is he OK?
Dr. Teeth: Let's go see! * Walks over to a curtain*
Behold! * Draws curtain back to reveal Kermit's (perfectly intact) corpse*
FROG BOY!
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Sleepless In Seattle
Best Bit In The Trailer: Well, there doesn't seem to be a concrete plot to this one. There's not even a hint at any gore.
They do manage to make the kid nice and creepy, though.
We liked this bit: "There's a lot of desperate women out there..." and the shot of Meg Ryan's face.
Gutted, Meg.
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: The Empire-state building finale - though, this time, she doesn't find the kid's rucksack up on the roof.
She finds his head.
When Tom Hanks returns with a sack and a meat cleaver, there's a bloody scuffle, and they both end up falling to their deaths.
We're not much into romance.
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(Scary) Mary Poppins
Best Bit In The Trailer: The part where Mary's descending from the sky with the aid of an umbrella.
There's something undeniably disturbing in the steady inevitability of her arrival. She appears, eerily, from the distance, gradually gliding closer, her figure unchanging.
Whoever thought that up, given the right platform, could have been a horror genius.
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: The "Spoonful of Sugar" scene, where Mary uses her telekinetic powers to tidy the children's bedroom.
Later that night, the crank on the jack-in-the-box keeps turning.
The tune is "Stay Awake", and it's Mary's voice the children can hear, humming the tune.
When the jack finally pops out of his box, a whole load of blood sprays out, too, covering the kids, who scream their little eyes out.
It's very cool.
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Uncle Buck
Best Bit In The Trailer: "I don't want him here..." There is real conviction in that woman's voice. It sounds as if she's about to cry.
She reaaally doesn't want him here.
The wintry setting is reminiscent of such films as Fargo and The Shining, where bleak and desolate landscapes give a feeling of desperate isolation. Uncle Buck looks a bit like John Wayne Gacy, too.
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: The clown scene.
A clown arrives to entertain the children at Miles (Macaulay Culkin)'s birthday party. However, the clown doesn't even make it into the house.
Buck kills the clown and takes its bloody clothes and mask.
He then entertains the children himself. By chasing them around the house with an axe. Choppy choppy!
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Seinfeld
Best Bit In The Trailer: 01:00 - "He's real, but he is not human..."
If you don't know Seinfeld, this could work as a pretty believable trailer to a low-budget gore-fest.
If you do know Seinfeld, it's a real treat.
The Sitcom-to-Horror transition is a tricky one, and is a bit far-fetched at times, but this one ain't too shabby. We're convinced.
Best Scene If It Was A Film: It turns out that Kramer is a homicidal maniac.
He's also a sexual deviant and kind of cannibalistic.
The proverbial hits the fan when one night he has one of his 'episodes' and loses patience with Newman.
This does not bode well for Newman.
He's hacked to pieces and his body chopped up into little pieces and kept in the freezer. Kramer claims that Newman moved to France to seek out his long-lost family.
Seinfeld is elated. Until Kramer's next 'episode', that is...
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The Lion King
Best Bit In The Trailer: This was an ambitious one. The Disney horror re-cuts usually look dreadful.
It's surprisingly successful though. A horror movie with lions?! They've got, like, a billion knives in their mouths !
Our favourite bit has got to be the very end. "You made me happy... BOOM !"
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: We like the idea of psycho Simba.
In the real Lion King horror, we'd expect that he goes off the rails a bit after witnessing the murder of his father.
After a stint in the jungle, living feral and alone (he ate Timon and Pumbaa), he returns to Pride Rock. He no longer has the social skills to get along with other lions.
He spends most of his time skulking in the shadows, stalking his lifelong love, Nala.
Things turn ugly when she starts getting off with his father's murderer, Scar.
Extreme, unbridled violence ensues.
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Mrs Doubtfire
Best Bit In The Trailer: This is our personal favourite.
There are so many good bits worthy of note: That creepy 'look' at 01.00; the disturbing telephone conversation which switches to reveal Robin Williams sitting on his bed; the kids' troubled faces when his identity is revealed; and the climactic final montage.
It's just so believable. We don't know if we'll ever be able to watch it again (yes, that is a bad thing).
Best Scene If It Was A Film: It's going to have to involve the children being kidnapped.
Their mother returns one evening to find bloody footprints in the hallway.
A trail of blood leads to the back door, where a blood-stained teddy bear has been abandoned on the step of the open door, next to a pair of false teeth.
Yup, it's dark. We want horror Doubtfire!
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