• Rub3z - September 27, 2013 10:25 p.m.

    Develop a super-suit. I'm imagining a (possibly (painfully) surgically implemented) biomechanical prosthetic that will allow me, under my own power, to run to my workplace in the same amount of time it would take to me to drive there. Start selling it at 10 million bucks a pop. With decades of R&D, these human enhancement prosthetics will eventually be widely available, and with further improvements allow humans the power of controlled flight under their own will. So... Iron Man suits, in a way. Except... hrrmmm... tangentially plausible. In other words, about as plausible as an actual Iron Man suit. So... a long damn ways off.
  • Testikills - September 25, 2013 2:39 a.m.

    The whole $800 mil would go straight up my nose. Have you ever seen Scarface? Well that would be me at breakfast...every day. Oh, and I'd also commission a snuff film starring Miley Cirus. Do you think Morgan Freeman would narrate a snuff film? What am I saying, I have $800 million dollars...of course he will.
  • dan-kramer - September 23, 2013 10:44 a.m.

    i would have copious amounts of unprotected sex and drop out of college
  • Rub3z - September 27, 2013 10:13 p.m.

    ... Plenty of people without 800 million dollars do that already. :P
  • TurkeyOnRye - September 20, 2013 12:36 p.m.

    "I'll tell you what I'd do, man: two chicks at the same time, man." And if you get that quote, you deserve a cookie.
  • avery78 - September 22, 2013 5 p.m.

    Office space
  • Sjoeki - September 20, 2013 9:30 a.m.

    What I would do with 800 million? OD, probably.
  • JarkayColt - September 20, 2013 7:28 a.m.

    Wait...before we all get carried away...$800 Million dollars isn't how much profit they made...right? So, "day one earnings" isn't entirely accurate. They couldn't just dump $800 million on your doorstep because they still have huge expenses to nullify first. Am I being a massive killjoy? I'm being a massive killjoy. But honestly, I would feel really dirty if I was given that much money, like, I'd want to get shod of it straight away. I'd probably put a few thousand in savings but then I'd walk about leaking the rest of it out of my ears. If I arranged for somebody to drop all of those banknotes out of a plane, do you think the surface would become a picture of chaos? In fact, what if you "lost" it in a really remote place of the world "by accident" and just sat back and watched as teams of idiots went out to find/fight over it? Also, it's getting pretty chilly recently so I might just crash out in front of the fireplace burning it all. Might actually work out cheaper than a regular heating bill.
  • icbacomingupwithapropername - September 20, 2013 5:09 a.m.

    Wave it in Activisions face while patiently explaining why games annualisation isn't a good thing. Seriously though I would probably go to university get a degree and attempt to live an ordinary life. My parents and siblings would also get a cut just to make sure that they are set for life as well.
  • Frieza - September 20, 2013 4:45 a.m.

    Blink-182's Rock Show music video. That is all.
  • Shnubby - September 20, 2013 1:27 p.m.

  • StrayGator - September 20, 2013 12:33 a.m.

    Buy peanuts. All of them.
  • BaraChat - September 19, 2013 9:39 p.m.

    The first spendings would probably towards clearing all debts for my family and I. Then a house for my wife and I, a house for my parents, a house for my brother and one for my sisters. And my wife's family as well. Then cars, furniture for the house, putting money aside for my eventual kids' college education, basic north-american needs. The rest is pretty much luxury. Of course I'll be tempted and probably will buy some crazy cars and technological shit, season tickets for the Eagles and the 76ers, and a gym and a football field so I can play basketball/football home, and stuff that don't come to mind right now, but I don't think I could even spend 25 millions with everything I'd want... So basically the other hundreds of millions will eventually end up being used in some "Bigger" projects like starting a charity and/or buy shares of a sports' team or something like that. I really don't know.
  • GOD - September 19, 2013 9:23 p.m.

    Step 1: Get a good lawyer. Because when you get money, people come after you. Step 2: Set aside at least 100 million as a reserve fund to not be used unless absolutely necessary. Step 3: Buy nice things for people important to me. Step 4: Be a philanthropist and sponsor certain things I enjoy, like say podcasters. Step 5: Buy an awesome house, but NOT a mansion. I don't want to blow my money on property taxes. Step 6: Buy a second awesome house. This is my first investment. They will only go up in value over time. Then I can just hire a property manager and have him manage renters. Step 7: Buy a desirable land, and then sit on it while places get developed around it. If I sell the land back too soon, then it will be at the edge of development and not that valuable. If I sell it after the area around it is heavily developed, it becomes prime business front property. Step 8: Travel the world and the seven seas. Step 9: Spend money on what I desire. Donate directly to smaller charities that make big impacts. Live a life not of opulence, but of comfort. Step 10: Remember seeing this article on GR in a kind of deja vu moment and then buy it from Future US. Step 11: Invest in edible Magic the Gathering cards for Greg.
  • Sy87 - September 19, 2013 8:56 p.m.

    I would fund a private army to prepare for the up coming zombie epidemic. And have one really big pizza party.
  • SpadesSlick - September 19, 2013 8:48 p.m.

    I'd buy myself an island definitely, complete with the outlandish supervillain flair that would be so excellent. I'd throw about 100 million to various family members and to charity, then put 200 million in an annuity so i'd always have money available. With the rest i'd probably buy up a game studio and try to start up a franchise. I've had a bunch of story ideas for a long time that i'd like to realize, and nothing says vanity project like a triple a franchise.
  • drachehexe - September 19, 2013 7:50 p.m.

    Set up my kids college funds. Buy a couple of houses, a couple of cars, a couple of motorcycles, and a truck. Buy the rights to the Gabriel Knight franchise and pay Jane Jensen to start work on Gabriel Knight 4. And maybe open a brothel.
  • C.King - September 19, 2013 7:33 p.m.

    sponsor school games clubs, and maybe dabble in a variety of industries. hire a troop of body builders to do a muscle march(it a wii ware game) in random places. invent crazy or stupid junk
  • J-Fid - September 19, 2013 7:28 p.m.

    Well, I would definitely buy a private island. I start my own video game company, and run it by my rules. The sheer amount of money would be used as insurance if the company were to fail. After that, I don't know.
  • haggerznaple - September 19, 2013 7:27 p.m.

    I'd buy a nice house, put aside a few dozen million in trust for each of my kids, deposit much of it into various bank accounts for a rainy day, and invest a healthy amount - but not enough to ruin me should things go south - into various business ventures. I'd like to say I'd retire young and live out my days in leisure, but I'm sure I'd get bored. Instead, I'd use the money as an excuse to follow a career I really enjoy, rather than feeling roped into the one that earns the most money.

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