What the hell is this Bayonetta statue supposed to be doing?

Bayonetta has a miniscule head. Shoot, it’s downright infinitesimal. There, we said it. Don’t believe it? Well, my friend, I present you with Exhibit A: this garage statue.

Found on Japanese site 2chan, this 1/6 scale statue made by Jigoku No Inu from Cerberus Project sports a pose that can only be used for comedy, so let’s play the speculation game.

Our theory: she’s tying to audition for a remake of Dr. Strangelove.

Above: Take out those guns, add a Stetson, aaaannndd…

Above: …she might just learn to love the atomic bomb

You may now try, in vain, to prove us wrong…

Jul 20, 2010


  • oufour - July 20, 2010 10:09 p.m.

    she was just playing halo and is trying to tea bag the other guy. mo body told her she was suppose to do it in game.
  • WillisTron - July 20, 2010 10:09 p.m.

    I want a 3DS statue
  • AnonymouZ - July 20, 2010 10:11 p.m.

    now now it may not be comedy... it may just be ballet.... with guns.
  • enlargedhousecats - July 20, 2010 10:14 p.m.

    she's shooting something of course
  • skynetiscoming - July 20, 2010 10:15 p.m.

    To me, it looks like she is trying to pee standing up. Not sure what her arms are doing tho.
  • 8bitBaby - July 20, 2010 10:15 p.m.

    she's trying to get out a double wedgie. girls get 'um all the time. gawwwd! her head IS small. but, over all it's pretty cool.
  • Amnesiac - July 20, 2010 10:27 p.m.

    No seriously, her boobs are bigger than her micro-head. What the hell?
  • AgentHonor - July 20, 2010 10:32 p.m.

    Honestly this is by far the best Bayonetta Figure i saw. Even better than the SE one. As for the pose, shes pretty much doing that quarter circle move with the guns. Or she might be impersonating how those blue thingies on Avatar shoot an arrow.
  • 510BrotherPanda - July 20, 2010 10:38 p.m.

    I'm going to need take some more crotch pictures, thanks... Meganekko are the best! reCAPTCHA:always wailing Because Bayo crushed my balls.
  • CH3BURASHKA - July 20, 2010 10:43 p.m.

    Uh... What was the question?
  • Talus - July 20, 2010 10:47 p.m.

    She's airing out her crotch it seems.
  • Manguy17 - July 20, 2010 10:54 p.m.

    shes trying to tea bag with kinect?
  • CandiedJester - July 20, 2010 11:16 p.m.

    It seems to me I remember her doing similar crazy poses throughout the game. I am not surprised. Good looking statue though.
  • Strangleme - July 20, 2010 11:18 p.m.

    I don't give a fuck what she's doing, I WANT THAT STATUE!!!!
  • ericeraqus - July 20, 2010 11:46 p.m.

    I think it's her taunt
  • DarkTone - July 20, 2010 11:55 p.m.

    It's pretty obvious theres a shooting game AND dancing game in one coming out for Kinect. What a lovely t-bag party achievement: unlocked.
  • RebornKusabi - July 21, 2010 12:48 a.m.

    You know what she looks like there to me? She looks like this old ass anime that I saw when I was in Junior High called Wicked City where there is a part where the main character is having sex with a random women and she turns into this spider-demon that has vagina teeth with leg and arm proportions EXACTLY like Bayonetta's... Huh... that usually isn't a good sign when a statue that is supposed to be iconic and sensual reminds you of an old anime that you haven't seen in literally 10 years, specifically the part where a guy almost gets his **** eaten off by a female spider-demon...
  • ventanger - July 21, 2010 1:44 a.m.

    ....that is a seriously unsustainable posture. This is partly why I couldn't stand enough of Bayonetta to finish the game, that game was made for people who actually lust after that statue.
  • FauxFurry - July 21, 2010 8:28 a.m.

    She summoning a demon wind from her nether regions,right? That or she's about to perform a jumping,magical time slowing Viewtiful Joe styled kick but that isn't as mean spirited to suppose,is it?
  • SwampRock - July 21, 2010 8:59 a.m.

    this is all very explainable. When bayonetta was a small child she lived in a village of crabs hence why she's in that pose, she does it when she needs to be reminded of home. And further more I believe she developed a new style for improving her overall accuracy with weapons using a very practical overhead approach, well done bayonetta you scored a 2 in one

Showing 1-20 of 22 comments

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