The Top 7... impractical characters

When the world needs saving, don't rely on these ill-prepared nutjobs

2. Ivy (Soulcalibur)
Dreamcast | 1999

We're the last group of people to discourage sexed-up characters in games, but Ivy needs a serious reality check. Her chest is constantly growing, and her fighting attire has dwindled to the point of absurdity. Stilettos and string bikinis? With what must be only dental flosscovering her ass? How does that thing even stay together?

Granted, the saying "if you've got it, flaunt it" has real-world application, especially if you're trying to hopelessly distract your opponent, but there's no way she could fight in that getup. Ivy's not alone of course, as there are many other impractically dressed fighter girls, but she's the worst. She's an attention whore, slowly taking it off while cosmetically enhancing herself in between competitions just so people will look. And look we do.

Ivy loses clothes in every sequel, yet gains a pound or two of pure boob. At this rate, there's an outside chance she'll still be clothed in part five, but by the sixth installment she'll be totally naked with assets that droop all the way down to her 12-inch heels. It's a strange day indeed when thisis comparatively tame.

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