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We'll admit it: we've got a massive man crush on Robert De Niro. Well, at least for classic De Niro, before all his films started to lose their shit in spectacular style in the noughties. Before then, he starred in some of the greatest war and crime flicks ever, any one of which would make awesome adult games.
Why the hell should we have to put up with Generic Space Marine 36 or Emo RPG Explorer 72, when we could be running people over with Taxi Driver's Travis Bickle or whacking wiseguys with Goodfellas' Jimmy 'The Gent' Conway? That's why we've taken the best movies from the 'Greatest Actor Ever' TM and mashed them up with brilliant games, to create the most badass Bobby titles ever.
Cabela’s Dangerous Deer Hunter
The De Niro mashup: Cabela’s Dangerous Hunts meets The Deer Hunter
It's the coup Cabela's been waiting for, as the seminally sucky hunting series finally bags itself the biggest catch of all: Bobby De Niro. Putting bloodthirsty players in the shoes of Michael Vronsky, an emotionally-crippled Vietnam vet, the game rewards you for murdering the shit out of as many proud stags as you can find.
So forget the 'Nam and how it ruined all your relationships and get ready to bag yourself a few trophy bucks in the ultimate eloquent commentary on war and its devastating effects. Mmmm, it's gonna be Bambi burgers on the menu tonight, baby!
Above: War is Hell... until you shoot it square in its furry face
Raging Bull Night
The De Niro mashup: Fight Night meets Raging Bull
EA Sports teams up with director Martin Scorsese to present the definitive boxing game. Shoving you head first into Jake LaMotta's world, players will get the chance to trade hands with some of the finest in the business.
When you're not beating seven shades of snot out of Sugar Ray Robinson, you'll indulge in entertaining mini-games, like horrible bouts of spousal abuse and putting your brother in the hospital. Yep, it's truly the sports game the whole family can enjoy.
Above: Now with 37% more brutal slow motion punches to the temple!
Heatman
The De Niro mashup: Hitman meets Heat
Relive Michael Mann's classic crime caper, with Heatman, an exciting collaboration between the filmmaker and Hitman developers IO Interactive. Slipping into the quiet, disciplined shoes of Neil McCauley, players will get to take part in the movie's finest moments. The bank heist. The classic coffee shop conversation. Shooting loads of innocent civilians in cold blood while dressed as Santa Clause! Wait, what?
That's right, in a slight twist from the film, players will have to complete complicated assassination missions for a shady agency with De Niro's newly bald master thief. And the best news? Those who complete all their hits will unlock a special alternate bonus game, where the Bob gets to rewrite the film's ending by putting a cap in Al Pacino's ass.
Above: Put the film's tragic ending right by giving Pacino's pesky cop exactly what he deserves
zachbob - September 22, 2010 1:47 a.m.