The 50 most gloriously stupid character names in gaming

The name game.

Names are tough, because there's such a fine line between sounding cool and sounding completely bonkers. A good name sticks with people, a bad one sticks with people because it sounds like something a porn star would reject for being too obvious.

We have a lot of porn star-sounding game character names in the following slides, as well as ones that are too-cool-for-school and others still that are just complete nonsense. If you've ever been picked on for having a goofy sounding name, take comfort in the fact that it could have been worse - much worse.

Pizza Pasta

Seen having a stupid name in: Punch-Out!! (arcade game)

Name is stupid because it sounds like: a first grader's attempt at identifying 'Italian things'. Seriously, was this THE FIRST THING that popped into the developers' heads when designing their Italian boxer? What about Gucci Gnocchi?

Bear Hugger

Seen having a stupid name in: Super Punch-Out!!

Name is stupid because it sounds like: a fun way to speed the weekend. Do you think when Bear's parents named him, they knew their son would grow up to be a grizzled old mountain man who's also a boxer? It was destiny.

Skullomania

Seen having a stupid name in: Street Fighter EX

Name is stupid because it sounds like: WrestleMania, only deadlier.

Duff McWhalen

Seen having a stupid name in: Mega Man X5

Name is stupid because it sounds like: Duffman from The Simpsons, oh yeah! Fun fact: the Duff is apparently short for Duffin, which doesn't make it any better.

Metal Shark Player

Seen having a stupid name in: Mega Man X6

Name is stupid because it sounds like: a device that plays metal sharks. What would even be on a metal shark? Music, videos, lots of teeth?

Ash Crimson

Seen having a stupid name in: The King of Fighters XIII

Name is stupid because it sounds like: a grab bag of words people think sound cool. If he started a band, it would totally be called Nightmare Final Infinity.

Cyber Woo

Seen having a stupid name in: King of the Monsters 2

Name is stupid because it sounds like: some sort of weird, online sex slang (unlike all that totally normal online sex slang).

Miles "Tails" Prower

Seen having a stupid name in: Sonic the Hedgehog 2

Name is stupid because it sounds like: a stupid pun on the phrase "miles per hour." Tails is a decent enough name, but when you learn his name is actually Miles Prower - which sounds like "prowler" - it makes him sound like a creepy stalker.

That Man

Seen having a stupid name in: Guilty Gear Xrd -SIGN-

Name is stupid because it sounds like: laziness.