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7 Great Historic Battle Scenes To Swede

We’ve just announced our new monthly Sweding Challenge – here’s a handful of suggestions to get you started.


Ease Of Swede 7/10

Make some costumes out of cardboard, purchase some fake swords (you get extra points for lightsabers) practise running in slow motion and make your movie. Simple.


Ease Of Swede 7/10

The horses aren’t a problem, you can ride a broomstick for all we care, but the location must be suitably grim, and you need a toy dog to unleash at some point. Failing that, get enough action figures together, dump an ashtray on them in the garden and you’re done.[page-break]


Ease Of Swede 8/10

All you really need for this one is a half-decent Scottish-Australian accent and a handful of stuffed toys dressed in medieval armour. Freedom!

Saving Private Ryan

Ease Of Sweding 5/10

It’s one of the stunning opening sequences ever made, an exercise in technical virtuosity. But who says that you can’t recreate it in your fish pond using water pistols while your brother shouts explosion noises. Not us![page-break]

King Arthur

Ease Of Sweding 9/10

One of the easiest, especially if you’ve already sweded Braveheart – it’s just the same with added girls. Get your girlfriend and her mates to dress up in leather bikinis, smear their make-up a bit, and you’ve got a budget Arthur that’ll arguably be better than the original.

A Bridge Too Far

Ease Of Sweding 7/10

Don’t worry, we don’t expect you to charter and private flight and leap out of it – stick some parachutes to your toy soldiers and chuck 'em in the sky, then cut to you walking along talking gruffly, and we'll be impressed.[page-break]

Return Of The Jedi

Ease Of Sweding 10/10

What do you mean it’s not a historical battle? It happened a long long time ago in a galaxy far far away, didn’t it? Either way, it’s easier to swede than a teddy-bears picnic. After all, you already know it off by heart, don’t you?

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