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70. Button-masher - Really just slang for "this game takes zero skill, strategy or thought to play." Whether or not that's a good thing is up to you.
71. A different beast - Not the beast we were just talking about, but a different one. And by "beast" we mean "game." And by "different," we mean "I probably shouldn't have wasted your time by bringing up the first one that this is so different from."
Above: PROBABLY.
73. Exciting new adventure - Publisher-speak for an adventure that's eerily similar to every single one you've already played, and only half as exciting.
74. Action-packed - There's some action in there, if you squint really hard. It must be packed in pretty tightly.
75. Rip-roaring - An exuberant adjective meant to conjure visions of rollicking good times and rollercoaster rides from start to finish.
76. Ever since… - Almost always seen at the beginning of reviews that start in with a historical introduction about the game, its series, its genre, its developer, the developer's family or what the reviewer found in his stool that morning. A clear sign you can skim down to the first mention of the game's title, which will probably be on the second page.
77. Test your might - Every game writer over the age of 25 is required by law to use this when writing about any Mortal Kombat game, in order to show how "old-school" they are for playing gamesduring the mid-'90s.
78. Incredible value - $29.99, according to most publishers.
79. Solid gameplay - The gameplay is neither liquid nor gas. Also meant to imply that the experience of actually playing the game - as opposed to watching its cutscenes or navigating its menus - is good. Not great, but good.
80. Turn off your brain - This game is incredibly stupid, but the reviewer enjoys stupid things. However, he or she was born without the gland that differentiates "fun stupid" (Earth Defense Force 2017) from "stupid stupid" (Charlie's Angels, Big Mutha Truckers, the phrase "turn off your brain"), so it would probably be a smart idea if you avoid the hell out of whatever it is he or she is touting.
81. Extending our lead - Publisher-speak for "lagging behind somewhat less in sales."
Above: Oh, shit, did we just go there? Sorry about that
82. You'll take on the role of… - You'll play as this guy. See Step into the shoes of.
83. Rave reviews - The game in question got, or is getting, reviews that averaged somewhere above a seven out of 10.
84. Chain together combos - Hit a bunch of buttons in sequence to make the little man onscreen visit horrible acts of violence upon those around him. Ooh, pretty.
85. Pick up and play - A quality touted by makers of simple games that don't require reading a manual or going through a mandatory tutorial to understand how to play. Of course, they'll make you go through a mandatory tutorial anyway, just to make sure you know how to jump and move in a straight line.
86. What could be better than that? - Oh, lots of things, actually.
87. Sets a new benchmark - Will require the purchase of a new PC in order to play.
88. Realistic physics - Industry-speak for "you can attach a string to a cinder block and push it off a cliff to solve a puzzle."
89. Addictive - Reviewer shorthand for games that keep you going for "one more level" until suddenly it's 5 a.m. and you've aged 30 years. It's also publisher shorthand for "please say this is addictive in your review please I've got kids to feed pleeeeeeease."
90. Gritty - Filled with manly he-men who live in an urban wasteland, grimace a lot and kick the crap out of each other without ever changing their expressions. Alternately, it's industry shorthand for "there are hoboes in this game."
Above: GRIT!
91. Wreak havoc - Would be one of the most overused phrases for describing outrageous, unrestrained violence, if only videogame reviewers could learn to spell it right.
