Sacred 2 gets its own website

Wipe off your stomachs you horny-bastard mouse-clickers – and thrust your pointer arrow into this warm and stickylink. Although you might think this is a new website dedicated to some game called Sacred 2: Fallen Angel, that’s just the PG-13 surface layer. This could really be your own masturbatory extravaganza if you love woman who can slice your blushing cheeks off.

So we ask you, are you one of the 1.8 million who bought the original Sacred? No? Well up yours, buddy. This action RPG slated for early 2008 doesn’t need you. You don’t deserve to go to this site and meet the main character, our little pretty goblin-murdering angel. You don’t deserve to learn about the gameplay and story and concept art. Man, you don’t even care that there’s gonna be six playable characters, do you?

But even though you hurt us, we’re going to take you back. Click here to view our humble Fallen Angelimpressions. We love you, baby. But you’re killing us.

January 16, 2007