Asus just dropped what smells like an Xbox handheld teaser, but I'm already underwhelmed

Asus just teased a new ROG Ally that could actually be the long-rumored Xbox handheld. Yes, it is April Fools Day, but the device maker has a habit of revealing real products during the gag period, and the new teaser has me thinking console fans should really curb their expectations.

The latest Xbox handheld nod and wink takes the form of a trailer featuring OMNI - Asus' adorable mascot. In the clip, the little red hoodie wearing robot uses a machine to supposedly upgrade themselves with "marathon stamina, more capacity, faster speed, and fresh look." But, a little mishap leads to a ROG Ally and Raikiri Pro controller joining them in a fusion pod, resulting in some sort of mysterious hybrid.

I appreciate this weird little homage to The Fly, but there isn't much in the trailer that solidly points toward an Xbox-flavored Asus ROG Ally. Even the Raikiri Pro controller is missing its central home button in a move that could be a deliberate easter egg. The only real reason I know think this best gaming handheld contender could be console-themed is thanks to Xbox itself replying to the teaser with a side-eye monkey meme.

Is an Xbox handheld worth getting excited about?

Run Omni_Upgrades.exe - YouTube

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I figured I'd be more hyped for an Xbox handheld after watching what is likely a teaser trailer for the device. Yet, I'm not even more convinced that we'll end up with effectively a successor to the Asus ROG Ally X with subtle splashes of console functionality. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited to see another portable PC powerhouse enter the fold, but I am slightly worried that Microsoft's involvement will be somewhat limited.

There's something about including a slightly modified Raikiri Pro gamepad in the teaser that doesn't sit quite right with me. Again, the Asus controller was missing its middle home button, but removing it was likely to prevent any on-the-nose references to an Xbox handheld. The thing is that if the new device does simply fuse that accessory with a ROG Ally, it'll feel more just like a premium portable with pro controller elements than something with specific Microsoft console DNA. After all, the pad does use its own third-party aesthetic, so the teaser hints don't really point toward anything with Series X/S vibes.

That's not a bad thing, far from it, but it's not what many fans would expect the first Xbox handheld to look like. Ultimately, it'll be down to Microsoft to come up with a software solution that helps the system feel like a console, and that could mean substantial Windows 11 updates are also in the pipeline. New devices like the Lenovo Legion Go S hammer home the fact that handheld optimization is sorely needed on the operating system, and I'd argue it's more important than any Xbox-flavored physical features.

What I'm saying is that Microsoft and Asus could team up to make an Xbox handheld that's virtually identical to an OG ROG Ally and still pull it off via software. Ideally, we'll end up with a portable with a custom hub that provides controller-friendly access to Game Pass while still retaining access to other storefronts through Windows 11. It doesn't feel like a big ask, but at this stage, I feel like I've been begging for a solution for years.

I'm still holding out for a fierce Steam Deck OLED rival that's made for Xbox games, but I'm not entirely sure if Microsoft is on the same page.

Already got Valve's handheld? Swing by the best Steam Deck accessories and best Steam Deck dock for excellent add-ons. You'll also want to peek at the best retro consoles if you're looking to play the classics.