Angus, Thongs & Perfect Snogging (2008)
Why So Terrible: Not so much a film title as a shopping list, this adaptation of Louise Rennison’s novel had the wherewithal to change the book’s ‘Full-Frontal Snogging’ bit, but nothing else. D'oh.
What It Should Have Been Called: Georgia Explains It All .
Live Free Or Die Hard (2007)
Why So Terrible: Attempting to carry on the Die Hard With A Vengeance title styling, this one fluffs it up majorly by having a title that has nothing to do with the film’s plot whatsoever.
What It Should Have Been Called: Uh, Die Hard 4.0.
I Dismember Mama (1974)
Why So Terrible: It’s hideously juvenile, and a daft corruption of the title of musical I Remember Mama .
What It Should Have Been Called: Crazed And Poor Albert And Little Annie is the flick’s alt title, which is surely one of the only movie titles ever to repeat the word ‘And’ twice. Personally, we like Murder! better.
I Bought A Vampire Motorcycle (1990)
Why So Terrible: Yeah yeah, it’s a parody of those I Married A Monster From Outerspace classics, but that doesn’t stop it from being cheesy crud. At least it has Neil Morrissey in it.
What It Should Have Been Called: Morrissey Vs. Motorcycle.
Quackser Fortune Has A Cousin In The Bronx (1970)
Why So Terrible: A title that revels in its stupid-named lead character. The cousin part also adds nothing but more unnecessary words to an already over-long title.
What It Should Have Been Called: Family Affairs .
Fat Guy Goes Nutzoid!! (1986)
Why So Terrible: There’s absolutely no excuse for a double exclamation mark. It doesn’t work when over-enthusiastic teenage Twits do it, and it doesn’t work in movies, either.
What It Should Have Been Called: It’s already got an alt title – uh, Zeisters – which is just as bad. There’s no saving thissun.
Can Hieronymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe And Find True Happiness? (1969)
Why So Terrible: Another patience tester, this one insists on shoving two full names in there. The Chicago Tribune rightly voted it to the worst movie title ever in 2006.
What It Should Have Been Called: Love Hurts.
I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998)
Why So Terrible: It doesn’t make any sense, temporally speaking. Seeing as it’s now been two summers since Julie James and co killed a man (then found out they, er, didn’t), that title’s completely inaccurate.
What It Should Have Been Called: I Still Know What You Did The Summer Before Last (ouch).
The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living And Became Mixed-Up Zombies (1963)
Why So Terrible: It’s so long it actually takes a discernable effort to read the entire thing. It’s also almost impossible to say without taking a breath half-way through.
What It Should Have Been Called: The Zombie Sing-A-Long.
The Perils Of Gwendoline In The Land Of The Yik-Yak (1984)
Why So Terrible: The land of the Yik-Yak? Seriously? Even George Lucas was better at coming up with silly names than this.
What It Should Have Been Called: Iron Maiden .
