Human beings love a good secret, and why shouldn’t they? Knowledge is power, and true power is knowing just which one of your friends bawled during the ending of Toy Story 3 (answer: all of them). Unfortunately, we--as a species--are also wired up to blab about every single speck of info that somehow ends up in our brains. We're a social species: a gossip-dropping clan of second-stage apes with nothing better to do, and that's exactly how we like it.
Luckily, sites like Whisper handily allow users to vent their pent-up hysterics with total anonymity. After spending hours gawping at the depraved secrets of others on Whisper, it occurred to me that plenty of video game characters could do with that service. So, with that in mind, I've decided to give the most troubled pixelsacks an opportunity to blow off some steam. Totally anonymously, obviously.