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Six videogame plot twists you totally saw coming

Sometimes, a game’s plotline can surprise you. Awhile back, we posted a story called the top 7 games with mega plot twists you never saw coming that showcased seven brilliant “gotcha!” moments in gaming history. This is not that story. No, this story is a celebration of the unsubtle and clumsy, a compilation of those games whose plot twists were so thinly veiled, so heavy-handedly, elbow-in-the-ribs foreshadowed, that everyone and their grandmother figured it out ten minutes in. The only people fooled by these swerves were people who called it, but second guessed themselves, thinking, “Nah, it can’t be that stupid and obvious, can it?”

Yes it can, friends. Yes. It can.

One last thing before we dive in (just in case it isn’t obvious)…


Uncharted 2: Among Thieves


Above: Nathan “Suction-cup-fingers” Drake 

The Situation: Uncharted 2: Among Thieves is the second grand adventure of everybody’s favorite smart-mouthed, mercenary-murdering rapscallion – Nathan Drake. The story begins when Drake is approached by Harry Flynn – a long time buddy and past partner in crime, apparently – and a hot Australian chick named Chloe Frazer. The two present Nate with an offer he can’t refuse: The chance to steal a Mongolian oil lamp that just may lead them to the sunken fleet of Marco Polo. Oh, and there’s lots of treasure on said fleet…

The Twist: Harry Flynn is a backstabbing douche bag who double-crosses Drake once he has the treasure map.

Above: Honestly, Nate – this guy wasn’t suspicious to you? 

Why You Saw it Coming: Ah, betrayal plot twist, our old friend. We meet again. Take a look at any major game release (i.e. Modern Warfare 2, Dead Space, The Saboteur, etc.) and it’s as if game developers have to meet some sort of industry-enforced betrayal quota. The whole instance in Uncharted 2 wouldn’t have been so bad if there had at least been some better foreshadowing. A single red herring would have been nice. But there weren’t any.

Which makes it all the more unbelievable when Drake puts on a shocked, doe-eyed expression when the bastard Flynn grabs the map and books it. You’re both career criminals and you didn’t see this coming, Drake? The guy looks like a cross between some sort of English version of Christian Slater and Satan, and has a smile that could make a Mafia hit man nervous. The only real shock is that he had the courtesy to wait a full 45 minutes before shoving the knife in your back.


Bayonetta


Above: More, please 

The Situation: Imagine female sexuality that’s so intense it can bend the space-time continuum, and then punch yourself in the groin two or three times. That is Bayonetta’s plot. Bayonetta is an amnesiac witch who uses her magical hair powers to dispatch angels. We’d love to give you more contexts for this; however, we lack the high-powered pneumatic drill necessary to pierce the convoluted mess that is Bayonetta’s storyline. During her travels, she rescues a small girl named Cereza from an angel attack. The girl calls Bayonetta “mummy” and shows a natural aptitude for magic…

The Twist: Cereza is actually Bayonetta as a child.

Why You Saw it Coming: Umm…well, let’s see. The game pulls this little girl out of nowhere, angels are almost irresistibly drawn to her, she rocks a pair of stylish frames, and sports a hair length that borders on the inexplicable. Oh, and we actually see her develop a love of lollipops, which are practically a fashion accessory to the grown-up Bayonetta.

Sure, the game tries to throw you off by having the kid call Bayonetta “mummy,” but you already know the sultry witch has been trapped in a coffin for the better part of five centuries. That doesn’t offer many opportunities to make babies. You may generally not understand what the hell is going on or why the hell it’s going on, but you’ll see this one coming from a mile away. Even Bayonetta didn’t so much as bat an eye when she figured out who the kid was. Whatever – it’s magic.

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63 comments

  • Kaeda - December 29, 2010 8:13 p.m.

    Hitman. Seriously, just pick one; he gets set up in all of them so far. Interestingly enough, he has yet to be betrayed.
  • danabramovici - December 10, 2010 7:17 a.m.

    "Is that best friend hair? Is that a “nice to see you still alive” face? No, it is not." is one of my favourite captions on anything ever. walk tall. eat a steak. well done.
  • garyn-greene - October 19, 2011 4:20 p.m.

    Completely agree. I was skimming the article, read that line, and just LOST it. Among the best captions I've ever read, as well.
  • AvatarIII - December 7, 2010 5:30 p.m.

    i don't see anyone suggesting Ratchet and Clank A Crack in Time, the one where a blatantly sinister looking/sounding ally turns up part way through, and he's constantly doing things his own headstrong fasion
  • BurntToShreds - December 6, 2010 6:49 p.m.

    Metal Gear Solid series: Ocelot betrays/deceives everyone.
  • Ipriest54753 - December 6, 2010 4:51 a.m.

    Just cause 2 - the thing everyone wants is the oil... you don't fucking say
  • Zepaw - December 6, 2010 2:05 a.m.

    Didn't see Dead Space coming, but it was the kind of twist that makes total sense as something that I should have seen coming afterward. The videos were clearly clips, not her communicating with him. Awesome game, hope 2 holds up well.
  • jordanlacroix95 - December 5, 2010 11:23 p.m.

    this one spams through the splinter cell series : work for organization , organization boss is an asshole
  • sveini22 - December 5, 2010 8:31 p.m.

    Reznov in Black ops ?
  • Vulneratus - December 4, 2010 11:46 p.m.

    I have to say that while the twist in Dead Space was painfully obvious from practically 10 minutes into the game, I certainly did not get the impression that Isaac was insane but rather that the hivemind (or artifact or whatever) was screwing around with him and projecting those images of Nicole. And yeah I have to say the whole "beaked"/masked assassin person in Resi 5 turning out to be Jill was not only the most woefully-executed plot twist I've ever experienced in a game, it was mildly insulting. That might be over the top but c'mon... it was like: if at the end of The Usual Suspects the big twist turned out not to be that Kevin Spacey's character was Kaiser Soze but that he had a noticeable limp.
  • yoyoguy - December 4, 2010 5:49 p.m.

    bayonetta's breasts are MUCH bigger in that picture than i remember them in the game.
  • quincytheodore - December 4, 2010 8:02 a.m.

    I saw Dead Space but not that early. By the time I felt stalked from the sound of vent shaft, yeah this is the only game that managed to did that, and she was still marginally calm compared to other FUBAR survivors, it felt like she was on a different place. When she appeared, it's odd that I was armed to the teeth and she looked so.. casual... Well she must be dead.. the last scream was good though..
  • Defguru7777 - December 4, 2010 8:01 a.m.

    Holy crap I saw Assassin's Creed's ending coming! It was painful!
  • nomnom52 - December 4, 2010 7:50 a.m.

    The Mirror's Edge pic reminds me VERY much of my sixth grade teacher. I look at her, and see horror staring back at me.
  • Genericide - December 4, 2010 4:36 a.m.

    Dunno if this counts but Haze even had its big "the people you're working for are evil" twist in it's damn commercials, for heaven's sake.
  • dogfacemanchild - December 4, 2010 2:10 a.m.

    I thought the plot twist for in COD Black Ops was pretty obvious like halfway through the game
  • Pudge - December 3, 2010 11:38 p.m.

    You guys missed the worst one of these in modern gaming. Singularity. You start the game off, get warped back into time and kill some guys. You play the rest of the game, standard time travel plot, and then they try to pull a BioShock on you at the end by saying O CRAP, YOU CHANGED HISTORY BY KILLING SOMEONE IN THE PAST! It's so dumb, the entire game's premise is that you're fighting against the weird new future you made and then that's supposed to be the twist? It had me laughing at the end.
  • steviemw85 - December 3, 2010 9:48 p.m.

    forgot jak II's predictable twist where the kid who doesn't speak is actually a young jak. theyr identical! anyone who didnt notice thats n idiot
  • WickedSid - December 3, 2010 9:43 p.m.

    I totally saw that ending coming.
  • NightCrawler_358 - December 3, 2010 8:28 p.m.

    I saw all of these coming except for Dead Space. I loved that ending and was all "NO WAY!" so where is 2 going? Running around an asylum like Batman?

Showing 1-20 of 63 comments

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