Can Seth Rogen Please Do Something Else Now?

This Friday, fuzzy-haired funnyman Seth Rogen appears in Kevin Smith’s cum-com Zack And Miri Make A Porno.
He plays a sleazy stoner who looks kind of geeky but is oddly brash and scatalogical and sex-obsessed.
See also: Knocked Up (sleazy stoner who looks kind of geeky but is oddly brash and scatalogical and sexually potent).
See also: The 40-Year-Old Virgin (sleazy stoner who looks kind of geeky but is oddly brash and scatalogical and sexually experienced).
See also: Pineapple Express (sleazy stoner who looks kind of geeky but is oddly brash and scatalogical – now with contact lenses).
Seth is morphing from edgy, progressive take on today’s conflicted twentysomething male into a samey template for emotionally arrested boy-men.
Even the funniest jokes have trajectory: they peak and then quickly nose-dive – particularly if they’re repeated too much. Seth is a funny guy who’s repeating himself. And his ‘things’ are repeating on us…
He wears glasses – so, he’s non-threatening to guys and slightly vulnerable and compromised to girls – particularly girls who fetishise guys with poor eyesight.
He has an incongruously deep voice for a bloke who wears glasses. This was amusing(ish) in Knocked Up. Now, it seems like an affectation to chime with his image. (Evidence: the perfectly normal voice-work as that vulture in Horton Hears A Who.)
He does that face, too much. This one…

And here…

And here…

Fine. We’re sure he’s a cheery kind of fella. But that face says, “H-HEEEY!”. It says, “I AM ZANY! LIKE ME, LIKE ME!” Seth is a very rich and successful man. Surely he doesn’t have to try that hard, any more.
He talks dirty. That’s okay, but for a guy who looks like he’d be more comfortable discussing World Of Warcraft missions online with strangers in Sweden, again, it feels pre-planned.
He smokes dope. Then he says silly, spaced-out things and craves junk-food. This officially stopped being a source of comedy around the time of Cheech & Chong’s Still Smokin’ (1983).
I like Seth Rogen. But it’s time he stopped being the fuzzy-haired, scrubby-bearded, lumberjack shirt-wearing, pot-puffing, sexy-talking (in a deep voice) superspod poster-boy and did something else .
There’s something of the Rick Moranis about him. Back in the ‘80s, Rick’s schtick was the nerdy, anxious type who girls seemed to find irresistible.
See also: Woody Allen.
Like Seth, Rick had an annoying surname and appeared in too many mediocre films. One minute, he was opening movies. The next, he was that stupid pretend-nerdy guy.
So, constructive suggestions for what Seth Rogen could do next in the Comments box below, please. We’ll start…
Close-cropped haircut. Clean shave. New glasses. Smart clothes. Serious Michel Gondry film where he’s not allowed to do that face and he doesn’t talk about cocks.
Then he can get busy working on becoming the new Jim Carrey instead of the old Rick Moranis.


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